Embrocation Cycling Journal

242: Roll With A Good Crew.

2010-08-23T23:12:00.001-07:00

Roll With A Good Crew.

This is kind of what my brain felt like during most of the 2010 Rapha Gentlemen's Race (West Coast). But, I'll re-iterate it now before you actually check it out, the guys that I got to ride with absolutely killed it. So much fun.

And I did not put this part into that part, but with our handicap we started almost last... and none of the real racing teams that started after us beat us. And great job to Veloforma, Cycle Path (Curse you Patrick Wilder) and Ironclad. Crusher central. Enjoy.

241: Gentlemen's Stage Racing.

2010-08-12T23:38:00.001-07:00

Remember? Now you have to go to the Embrocation Site to read these little nuggets of truth. Ok, maybe chicken nuggets of truth is better? I will give you a hint. This current one involves Stage Racing and sex. Just a hint of sex, but sex none the less.

See you soon.

240: The MAD Show: Bespoke

2010-08-05T02:16:00.000-07:00

Now you have to go HERE to see it. Change your RSS feed. Updated the wife and let her know that is where you will be spending your time. Ok, that might be a little extreme. But either way, keep an eye on the Embrocation Cycling Journal Site for all the updates. Thank you.

Tonight, at the Cycle Club. Framebuilders! Conti Riders! You! (hopefully).

239: The Cycling Librarian

2010-07-29T00:08:00.000-07:00

I got a new Blog. Check it out. It is right at the top. Unless you're already there. In which case you will not see this...

Two weeks ago I was lucky enough to get to spend the week in New York City. Wow, what a place, that city. A worthy adversary for sure. And now that we are on the subject, I think that it is safe to say that I know why people call it 'the City.' It used to piss me off when people from NYC would say that, referring to the place that they call home 'the City.' It just sounds so uppity and fucking annoying if I am allowed to speak plainly. And I am.

But when you spend a little time there you start to realize why it has earned its moniker. It has something to do with the people on top of people, but also the accesibilty of everything. The City itself defines exactly what it means to be a city, and then takes it to such an extreme that you cannot help but succumb to it. At least I did.

I found myself traipsing around the Lower East Side at night, nodding to the sentry's behind the newsstands, talking to loud into my phone and crossing the street whenever I damn well please. Same with being on the bike. If there is a way that I could bring Piers North out here to give a little lesson to...well, all of Portland, I would. And his lesson would be this "How to Ride your Bicycle in an Urban Environment." On one 20 block ride he nearly crashed into four old ladies, almost tipped over a fruit stand, and ran 32 red lights. It must be noted that not one of the old ladies even blinked as they avoided his spinning front wheel. I was in heaven while this all happened. Not even joking. I miss the days that aggressive city cycling was the norm.

And what was I doing when I was riding through that sweaty city? Commuting to work of course.

The Cycle Club is well on its way to Cycle Club infamy, as far as those things go.

And it has everything to do with the man in charge. I do not mean Brett Cleaver, I mean the man really in charge. If you do not know who Mike Spriggs is, you best familiarize yourself. Aside from Gage & Desoto (I always forget to ask where the name comes from) and being the head honcho over at the Club, he is also a) a really nice guy and b) a fierce collector of bicycle books. And aside aside from that he can be seen above furiously writing out the next days TdF Stage on the Leaderboard. And that was before he went home and wrote out a recap of that days stage (the yellow clipboard below the chalkboard).

No shit? - You're saying that to yourself right now aren't you? You did not know that about Mike. Well, now you do. The best part about this though, if you live in 'the City' is that Mike has made his library available for you to peruse. Well, he has made them available to you, and he has also stocked them with some of the better Cycling Publications out there, but also that have ever existed.

There is the current stock of pubs. Yeah, got it Alberto, you're saying Two with your hands there. But, really, if you had wanted to be ominous for PRO Cycling there, you would have held up "tres" fingers for us to see. (Tres is three in Mexican in case anyone is keeping track). But really the point of all this buildup is to get to the one that I have already shown you. It is this one right above, with Greg Lemond in the Stars and Strips (I like 'Strips' better because in England that is what they sometimes call Soccer Uniforms - Strips, and once a very beautiful, very English girl told me that she liked my Strip - it got weird because I thought she said "I'd like you to Strip" but alas, not all of them work out as planned - except that one did.) Aaaanyway...

No idea really as to why it is called "Eddy Merckx The Fabulous World Of Cycling" other than the fact that he wrote the intro. But I would venture a guess that if we had to call all of Cycling - Eddy Merckx, like, if he owned it, well, I guess I would be ok with that. "No Argue" he would say after that, and no one would.

The book itself is fuuuucking amazing though. I had the extreme pleasure of sitting with the author of the book Typography for the People (peep it in the photo where Mike is writing furiously - and then go buy it cause its awesome and comes with free fonts) and it is safe to say that we both went apeshit over the whole thing. The kits that everyone is wearing, every photo with Lemond and his neatly feathered hair, and some of the sponsors that were a part of the sport were mindblowingly awesome as well.

For a book about cycling, the were sure into the gore of the sport. Although, I guess, who isn't? The layout of the book is fantastic. The commentary alone is worth trying to find the book, I only glanced at a few of the descriptions, but they are all written with a strange air to them... take this one for example..

"In any case Kuiper's Victory deserves our full respect." Oh yeah? Well then why did you spend the lines before it talking about someone who had the potential to win, but did not? I find that to be an odd remark.

Just to have a visual photo album of the '83's races makes the book stand out on its own. The only thing better would be to have it signed by everyone involved, like a sort of yearbook.

"Hey Greg Sweet Race at Worlds! You win. Ps - Quit trying to use those dorky handlebars, they're never going to get you anywhere" - Prof.

"Yo Greggy. Time to get a cool nickname eh? Say hi to the ladies for me...
j/k see you in Colorado. Oh yeah, did you see that photo of me when I won Fleche? So badass!!" - Bernard "the Badger" Hinault

In any case, I am sure that we could go on and on with that one. Thanks goes out to Mike for sharing his beloved Cycling Library with everyone. Stop over and say hi and he would love to talk to you about Cycling. Or Bikes. Or Books. Or Babes (what? it starts with a "B"). But, my question for you - dear readers - is who the hell is this?

238: Wayward Motorhomes

2010-07-27T00:03:00.000-07:00

It is official. That just happened. Garrett Chow and total MASH-er just emailed me to let me know that this bad boy just dropped. Or is about to drop, or however the hips and hops happen, this is it. I showed this to my roommate Steven Hunter and it is possible that he lost his mind a little bit. Maybe not officially, or outwardly, but he definitely wanted to. And I can just about hear Rich Bravo and Whit Yost clamoring for their credit cards on this one.

Artoo from Hypebeast covered it too.

Speaking of Rich Bravo apparently this is what happens when you forget your new (and I might add custom colourway-ed) Oakley's at his apartment in Chelsea. This gives Rich the full on right to literally molest my glasses though different parts of that tiny island that we like to call Manhattan. And I have to say, if there is one way to do it, it is this... However, I am not going to lie, I like you and all Rich, but you could not have gotten ANY cute girls to model them? Or homeless? I mean, come on man, take it to the extreme. Although, just the simple fact that you got them that close to the flowing mane of that hairdresser (yours??) gives you a few much needed style points.

Now, Um, can I get those back?

The thing to note is that Bravo dressed appropriately (as always) in an Embrocation Luchador T-shirt. Which, always makes me happy. Now, if only I could get him to model the DOPE one, those could also start flying off the proverbial shelves. I promise, it is not a comment on cycling. Or is it? The other thing that I really liked about Rich's exploits with eyewear was that he kept on calling them the "Wayward Lenses." Now if that is not someone who studied 'the Classics' then I do not know what defines these people...

And Spriggs. He got Mike Spriggs and Andrew Crooks in on it. Bastards!

237: Ciao

2010-07-25T20:20:00.000-07:00

Dear Mr. Armstrong,

I am just going to jump into this one here. Fuck You Lance Armstrong! And I hope this comes up in your google reader alerts too. Fuck you for making me stand in front of the television screaming. I have done it before, and something tells me that I will do it again. I realize this second part to be true mainly because of what I am watching at this very moment. Stage 20 - 2005 Tour De France. Great time trial by the way. You handily made every look a fool, and did not blink once.

What the fuck Rasmussen? Get it together. I remember yelling it the first time and I remember yelling it today as I stood wrenching at my hair. The sun is going down on Portland, and this race has already run its course. I remember Hincapie getting pissed, I remember the heat! and JAN Germany's answer to a great cyclist and even worse a "bridesmaid" as Slate says, than Hincapie.

I remember with this time trial came the slow weaving through the quaint French towns Ullrich literally wrenching the shit out of his bike at every corner. Wearing everything on a face as bright fuchsia as his T-Mobile jersey. This is the one where Papo had a chance to show what a great cyclist he was going to be (or not) by winning the (cursed?) white jersey of best youngestest rider, or most aggressive in the kids category, as I like to say... And also where we start to grasp at the full severity of Vino's craziness. So, I guess we have you Lance, to thank for all of these th...

WAIT! there goes Rassmusen diving into the ditch over his bike. Seriously, what was going on with that guy? Get. It. Together. And He's Catching Him! Armstrong has almost caught Rassmussen and he will!! And then, just as Rass slumps down from realizing that he has been caught. You, Lance are going to jam that fucker back up to 11. Just grab the fucking nob and rip it right off. Right in his face. I was actually afraid for Rassmussen at this point, like, that some sort of bodily harm would come to him.

And this is the part where I go 'Why Not?' I too, got a little verklempt today when they were showing all the clips of the race, and more importantly your career. But, why could I never fully get behind (all the while cheering for and against and for) Lance Armstrong? Was it because of your longer than long black shorts? Your Robocop attitude and overwhelming desire to win? Maybe the attitude, but I would never hold it against anyone who wants to win. Is that not our main goal in life? As cyclists, as people, to win? We never had the chance, mid competition to see you soften or dare I say, soften with you, because nothing (after your comeback) never, ever went wrong for you. And if it did, or seemed to, you just sort of swooped it up in your infinite grasp and it was over with....

Myself you ask? Well, I'm glad that you asked, thanks. I was brought up on a pretty steady diet of high school football. You had to if you were from my town, and even if you did not play, no matter where you turned you got to see how amazing a team they were. How many State Titles they had won, who the stars were... Similar to, I would have to guess, the place that Lance Armstrong comes from. Of course, I am placing a Texas is a football state on everything, but, I can do that. With that being said when I read "It's not about the Bike" I kept wanting there to be more disdain for other sports (especially football.) Just about that time college was just beginning to show me that athletics, and being an athlete could be 'cool.' It probably helped that I was surrounded by really great athletes, and just to hang around them and glean information about what it would take (training, mental fortitude, extreme drinking) and besides, I was there to learn.

When I saw you ride I felt so much that feeling that I wanted to believe it was possible to do. To ride, or in my case, run myself out of town. And never look back. So, you gave me that. The thought that being from somewhere did not have to dictate where you went. There it is - Rise Up - and then crash it down when you just could not leave Bro-Town (that's a now-relavant term, for being a big time Jock in high-school) out of it. You were still from a town in Texas, that guy up on the podium. You scowled from beneath your baseball cap (who needs cycling caps anyway who cares if they're about tradition?) you stalked from press conference to press conference like an insolent child, even I, as somewhat of a child recognized this. Oh yeah, and you didn't bother to even try to pronounce French words.

And on the same hand you were riding away from the best in the world. Smashing them. Make them look a fool, and making myself go YES! No! Just one more time.

I smashed this kid once. We ran the mile against each other all the time, and I think usually it was pretty close. Then came the day that he told me (to my face) that he was going to beat me. He really just came up to me - with two girls on his arm - I remember this part clearly because one of them was from my hometown, and had come here expressly to see him race. She was part of the popular crowd - so to speak - no word from her these days, she probably got fat, not the point. The point was that he came up and told me he was going to beat me in front of my dad. Luckily, my mother was elsewhere and did not have to hear this particular brand of nonsense. But I think that this was maybe the point where dear old dad unleashed the beast, and gave me my free will. That could be a pretty hefty topic to discuss, so we'll have to get back to that.

But what I did was smash this kid. I took that little ball of anger in my stomach - thanks Schleck for that - and unleashed it on this poor, unsuspecting kid. I did not feel bad about it at the time, and I do not feel bad about it now. I am just using that aside to show you that I am capable of understanding what sort of rage is bubbling and how it gets used. Mine was the hate coming off of one guy. Yours was the hate of a whole country of peoples (France) that you never even saw because you were too busy boiling down the anger into something manageable. I get that too.

And at some point, I also learned what it takes to hate something, then channel it, and eventually turn it on yourself, and others in a way that could cause it to be very explosive. In fact, if you did not have a physical outlet for it, such as running, or cycling, or smashing expensive china with a whiffle ball bat. And I could see this as being very destructive.

However, I think that is why you became so great. You brought out the absolute best in everything and everyone and at the same time caused the polar opposite in everyone else. Everyone that was not in on it. Or everyone that you deemed unfit to reap the rewards that you offered with undying loyaly... So, polar are your opposing sides that I think they should make up a new word for it. Opposar. Maybe? Or the art of it could be called Polar-Opps? Maybe there is already something like that though?

But whatever it is its strong. And while it is apparent that your grasp is slipping in the way that that race is no longer mutable in your hands, your effect is still great. When you slipped from the rankings with enough finality to finally make it believable you left a great void. And cycling will recover from it, people will learn to watch the race even if you are not in it, or provide some sort of context for them to understand it...

The racing too will recover. I thought that after I watched the second have of that fateful timetrial in 2005. Remember how you launched yourself up the Mountain after you passed Rassmussen? And then the water was splashed in your face and we thought you might react - but you didn't. And then you crossed the finish line, eyes, nose and face all steeled as if they have been preparing for a winter alone in the woods.

So, yes, the racing will indeed recover. But no matter how you slice it...whether we love you or hate your guts, you have left a void in this sport. Or maybe a wound? Maybe you left a wound that is still slightly weeping. The scab was reopened for a minute there and we tried to temper it with gauze, but maybe that was not the answer after all, maybe we should just let that shit air dry? Lets try that this time around.

Oh and while you're out saving the world, I keep getting email saying that this dude is stuck in a Russian Prison, can you look into that?

236:"The Genius Controls the Chaos"

2010-07-22T15:10:00.000-07:00

I know it is Friday, and I know that it is the last Friday before the end of the TdF. And while the race may already be decided, it also might not. What I am hoping is that Schleck pulls out some newfangled contraption - not a motor for his downtube we already have those - some kind of special handlebars or something that offer his body a more forward - (ie futuristic looking) position on the bicycle (I know, I get it, they would have to be really space age to make that happen) and he wins the Tour by narrowly beating Contador due to his tactical advantage in the Time Trial. But, then again, that could probably never happen.

I hope you have some time on your hands.

It is wonderful to be able to watch the climbing stages over and over. This is not really something that I can always do, but I like to. Today, I sneak glances at the TV and Kolobnev as he goes for yet another of the KOM sprints. This is playing for the third time straight. Glad no one minds.

Andy Schleck too is a marvel to watch. Contador makes me jealous. Snakeships. Whatever, who cares, he looks unique, fluid, sleek but in his own curious way. And these are the people that I channel when I climb, knowing full well that I probably look like an awkward bar room brawling (complete with look cleats and carbon soles) version of these two. Heavier sure, but also muscling the bike around like I am trying to make it do my bidding instead of the perfect union that is either of those two. Ah well, it still hurts the same either way.

Speaking of climbing, I had the chance to ride with KV the other day. Turns out we did a little bit of climbing, for most of it I was again staring at the ground whirring away beneath my tires. New ones in fact, but that is besides that point. Kyle is one of these "editors" one of these guys who sits behind a computer screen, or bank of computer screens, all day and gets to just play around with videos. Or at least that is how I imagine his life to be. Dark and filled with cheetoes. Keyboards smudged with greasy orange paw prints. In truth I am sure that it is something a bit more sterile than that. And KV does not ride his bike like he eats a ton of Cheetoes.

The reason that we were talking about editing though is because one of the last pieces that KV edited is one that many of you have been seeing for the past...oh say 18 days or so...

My question for him was about the second move, where the camera pans back over the mountains and why that move was necessary. He said to help establish the fact that the voices were solely surrounding Mr. Armstrong and not a product of the environment. Makes total sense to me, but what he told me next was what made the whole thing ridiculous and funny. Apparently people who had watched the video online had written in to tell them (Nike and W + K in this case?) that the audio keeps cutting out throughout the film. And this is where KV reached out and started smacking his own helmet and saying "Its the voices in his head, its the voices in his head." See how they come back when the camera shifts back....nevermind.

What I also find interesting is the "Una Mas" commercial that has been airing directly after (or was it before) the Armstrong ad - and they aren't Nike Ads anymore - they're Armstrong ads. I have to say (no offense KV) that if I had to choose one over the other it would have to be the Specialized ad. Two reasons for this. Well, ok maybe more than two.

1) lighter. this evokes a spirit that LA has been missing for quite some time now
2) lighter. as in color and brightness. tone, if you will. quit being so fucking dour Lance. you did this to yourself, this was your choosing.
3) the music
4) we all know that he has voices in his head.
5) if I woke up from a crazy dream, naked in front of a crowd of people and it was on a Specialized Roubaix, or whatever Contador is riding now Spz-A36 or something, in Astana Blue, I would be less embarrassed than if I was riding a Trek Whatevs 940. Fer realz.
6) I like that 'Berto is doing hill repeats - fast - instead of ambling along looking back on his career and "all the pressure to do this" and "the people wanting me to do that." Heard It. Contado has made it all about the best part. Riding his bike.

I feel like a dick now. Sorry KV, your work is amazing.

----------------------------------------------------------------
Cycling Inquisition with an amazing story that includes but is not limited to: Colombia, drug trafficking, murder, infidelity, and Cycling. There is a video at the bottom of this post that I think you should check out. It is of JV showing off his hotel room and offers amazing insight into that man that we know and love. Family man? Maybe, check out his sleeping shirt and photos of his family. Also, a man of discerning tastes? Well, I do not blame you Jen's. I think that those synthetic feeling off color blankets are weird too...

Spriggs and I were talking about him all last week at the Cycle Club. Hoping for glimpses of him in post race interviews, or, more importantly, at the front of the peloton crushing peoples ever-loving spirits. Or, conversely taking a kids bicycle out for a joyride. The man will just not back down, and no matter what he said about stage 3, he still wins in my mind. Please do not retire my man. We need you.

Need proof? Jens Voigt? (please click that link). (pretty please). Damn, he has a sense of humor as well. What more can you want?

Honestly, let us get back to Spriggsy and I? Our JuJu must be taking some serious hold. Because in all probability it was just that type of talk that got us a mention near the bottom of that NYTimes post. Ok, not really us, but you know what I mean, that is our boy Graeme killing it on the Tourmalet. And just like that the revelations just keep coming.

One merry prankster in the comments sections offers insight into Voigt.

Joke from the Seventies:
"Why do cycling shoes have all those holes in them? To let the blood run out."
-brought to you by Harry from Boston.

Now enjoy this:

235: Visual Slippage

2010-07-21T22:20:00.000-07:00

Joe Staples wrote a nice little piece the other day about lying to yourself. I was featured in the post, but I think that it should be noted that it is solely because I ride with him all the time, not because I have any bearing on the actual outcome. He could trash me in a second. Most of these people that we ride with could. Only thing is - I was not wearing kneewarmers - psshh - who wears knee warmers?

But the truth of the matter is that he got me thinking about the ways that I lie to myself. And, at this point I will only tell you the cycling ones. If we were to go into the others things could get what you might call 'a little messy.' And then I am sure that I would start lying to you, which would be bad, or worse than just lying to myself.

I do not know if what I do would be considered lying because I am fully aware of it when it is happening and am also fully aware when it is over. What happens is that I start to slip, at least visually, and when the slipping starts, it is very, very difficult to stop. And I plead with myself (which is where the lying might factor in) but it is the whole procession of slipping that really is the point.

Most of us when riding get very focused on what is directly in front of us. Possibly not Jens Voigt his focus probably rests somewhere on the top of Pain Mountain, trust me you will never see it, this mountain, because it is in a far off land somewhere. Only he and a few others can see it. Bruce Lee probably saw it. Myself? I tend to focus directly on what is front of me.

Visual Slipping

Barring any real ailments I feel to be in pretty good health at the moment. The big toenail of my right foot fell of recently for no real apparent reason. But, other than that I feel to be the picture of perfect health — except for the fact that I am blind as a bat. I know that everyone says this at some point, especially if they wear glasses, which I do, but seriously I am fucking blind.

For example: I saw some old friends recently. These old friends have not been seen by me in quite some time, and during our time apart I purchased new glasses. This was their response to these glasses; "New glasses eh? I do not remember your glasses making your eyes look all bulgy and buglike the last time I saw you in them. Are they getting thicker?" Thanks guys, just for putting it out there, and yes they are.

For example2: If I were to lose one of my contacts in a race. I would stop and get off my bike. It really would be dangerous for me to be riding blind as a bat.

But the point of that is this: My slipping happens visually.

A person much wiser than myself once taught me a visual trick to help me close the distance between myself and another rider in front of me. He had noticed that I was letting too great a gap open and when he mentioned it to me, for one I did not know what he was talking about, and for two I said "well, why would I want to get that close to another cyclist, I might hit his rear wheel and take us both out." (this happened one time and it was not pretty)

So, being a much smarter cyclist than myself he passed along a little knowledge. "Look straight through the bike ahead of you and focus on their front hub." I tried and it worked extremely well. "You'll know what they are doing [by the movement of their front wheel] and instinctively move with them, and at the same time, you will be aware of the space between both of your bicycles."

It was easy, made sense and works every time. Until you start slipping.

If it happens quick, the slip, your vision will go blurry (you'll wonder if a contact fell out, like me) and you will quickly realize that you have exerted yourself a little too much and plain lost the wheel in front of you. Commence heavy breathing and stamping on the pedals. This method is a bit preferred only because it feels like an accident and any gap you have created can, hopefully, be quickly eliminated.

The slow ones are the ones to watch out for because by the time you realize they have happened, it could be over.

Phase One:
First my vision goes from the front hub to the bottom bracket. This seems ok to me because there is more visible motion happening in this area. The cranks are spinning effortlessly, smoothly in their little press-fit shell (little joke). This can also be an area of wonderment because this is where all the power from the legs is being transformed into forward motion. Even if it does mean I have slipped a little bit - and I am not worried about it.

Phase Two:
When you have gone from the bottom bracket to the read hub, then it is time to start worrying. Take note of what is happening (you are going backward) and start to work to counteract what is happening. I am slipping, ever so slightly off the wheel of whomever is in front of me. Immediately following this revelation, my sight will go to the very back of their back tire. Now, is time to be worried.

Phase Three:
Once I have exhausted the bike in front of me, it is time to move onto your own. Visual Slippage has now taken its toll and what you are left with, fortunately or unfortunately is your own bicycle. The machine underneath you. The problem here, well now you do not have a wheel to follow. Now you are left to your own devices. And if you do not have the mental fortitude of Jens (which unfortunately I do not) Well, then, I hope at least you are having fun.

It is possible to counteract the slip however. All it takes is the mental strength to reverse the process. Quite literally force yourself to look from the rear tire to the rear hub. Punch your eyeballs from the rear hub back up to the bottom bracket. Watch the spinning. And then when you have settled back into the rhythms that have kept you there in the first place. Move your eyes a bit further up to the front hub. Voila. Counteracted.

And while easier said than done, it is something to think about.

Today I slipped, fell off. Clawed my way back on. Slipped again, scratched the inside of my soul until it was raw, and then just decided to be content with how my knees looked bobbing on their own.

Then I was kindly berated for letting this side of things slip too. But it is definitely good to be out and about...

234: Union Foundry.

2010-07-09T01:16:00.001-07:00

This Union Foundry stuff is so cool. I'm not going to lie.

I feel really honored that they decided to include me in their pre-release. Please do not let the postmaster gods ever think I'm anything but stoked about everything. But, the truthiness of the matter is this: I do not have a track bike at the moment...therefor I do not know if I can be the best judge of this product.

Fear not, I have indeed found the perfect testing grounds for this new tool.

I think that I have figured a way to put is warp speed like precision to work. (No one actually says "warp speed like precision." Promise, just made that up.) Check out the video, which our pal Stebs made and then we are going to get back on this in a minute.

In the meantime, Tyler over at Independent Fabrication has a little bit more for you.

233: Always More.

2010-07-05T22:45:00.001-07:00

Notes on the Tour thus far:

Ouch. Ow.

"That's just bike racing, get on with it." -M. Cavendish

I like that there is a thing called the "Shack Tracker" how clever. Really? I would however like it more if the symbol that popped up was a metal detector. Just for fun.

The first two ads after each break are about Lance (Michelob and Nissan Leaf) and then the third one starts "Can Lance do it again..." or some shit like that. Seems to be a trend here.

J-you-are (Jaguar)

If Julian Dean has to carry that team. Something tells me Julian Dean will carry that team. Otherwise he won't.

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July

We used to joke in bike shops that the two reasons why July is notoriously the slowest month of the year, in terms of sales, was that everyone was either watching the Tour or out riding their bikes because they had just been watching the tour. The joke here being that no one would watch anything, ever, relating to bike racing all year, and then the Tour comes along and suddenly everyone and their brother is glued to the set. Then, as soon as the stage and recap is over they are out on their Cervelo P34's or their Trek MADone bicycles racing to Lexington and back, or tearing through downtown Milwaukee to make it over to the bike path along Lake Michigan.

I am not an early riser.

This will come as no surprise to anyone that has spent any amount of time with me. I want to be, I try to be, but no matter how you slice it, I do not like to get up in the morning. I know for a fact that many, many, many of you will be up in the early morning hours of the day enjoying coffee, eating your breakfast and watching what unfolds in the Tour de France tomorrow. However, the only thing in those last three mentioned that can get me close to getting out of bed is the thought of coffee. So, until that happens I will be burrowed under the covers hoping to eschew any sort of stray light that can and will get through to pierce my eyes and wake me from wherever I may have drifted off to. Which is where I would rather be.

The benefit of having the Tour on in the morning is that your friends will not want to ride until later in the afternoon (9am instead of 7am in most cases) and one can be left in peace. The secondary benefit of the rides being later and the tour being on is that we now have something to talk about rather than the usual which goes dog, kids, wives/girlfriends (in that order). The tertiary benefit of this is that I would rather hear their take on what happens on the day first - seriously - I do not care if you "Spoiler Alert" me all damn day - I just want you to tell me who won. And in this fashion I can build up all the nasty rumors (CAV totes hates Fair-uh) and all the ugly truths (Schlecks do not do this to me) and then go and check them out for myself with the intense-o moments quietly disposed of.

But really, the truth of the matter is that these people, my friends, as they watch the Tour they are filled with this hope (however false) that they will ride in a manner similar to those brightly painted gladiators that they have just viewed. So, then they come out of their hiding places, eyes all squinty at the sun, and we ride. And in July, it seems, we ride harder than usual.

————————————————————————
More Small Publications

Because of all this talk about small publications I keep thinking back to this one that Rich Bravo gave me on my last visit to NYC. Only problem was that I could not decide which was the best background to present it with. As you can see, I decided on the little gravely bits.

The book is small by anyone's standards, which means it is about "yay" big. I held up my hands to show you the actual size, but I am sure you cannot see that at this point. The book is shot and designed by Lucie E. Kim and is part of the MyORB collective of goodness. You can see more photos that are similar to my photos there.

The book is a great look at Keirin racing as an introduction and the format makes the book accessible in a way that handheld paper objects should be. You want to stuff this one in your pocket and take it with you. Here is an idea. Make something like this with blank pages in between the photos? Like a cross between a notebook/journal/love letter to the sport?

Not that you should write over these photos, I do not condone that type of behavior (I did have someone tell me at the 4th of July party I went to that he 'circled up' volume5 so that he could show me all my mistakes at some point). Which, at first struck me as an odd thing to do, and possibly made me a bit angry (not so much as when people roll it up and try to stuff it in things though) but then when I put down the whiskey it made a bunch more sense, because what a better way to illustrate than with my own magazine?

I am enamored with the size of this book, sure, but also the design elements get me going as well. I like the a lot of the photos have been blocked in this strange way that makes you feel like you are not seeing the whole picture, but still gives you enough information to know what is going on. The lines and patterns that make up not only the track itself, but also the entire stadium also lend itself to visually making this velodrome setup feel a bit alien, at the very least foreign. Which I guess makes a lot of sense.

Their website is not the only place to get this book. Bravo told me he picked it up when he went to visit this new shop Adeline Adeline (same one Quirk raved about a while back in What's New). I like that they are carrying alternative publications like the one above and plan on visiting them when I head out to the Cycle Club in the coming weeks. This month is going to be all about publications, I promise.

Here is one last shot to leave you with. This is something that we made over the winter but never fully utilized. Until now that is. July is also the month to send Postcards apparently? And since they play off of one of my favorite things in the world - Mail!!- they cannot be all bad right?

We made four different postcards. There are two cross tyres and two road tyres. If my memory is serving me correctly the one you see here is from the Saxo-Bank team before the start of Paris Roubaix last year. The other road one is also from that collection, and then there are two cross ones as well.

232: Play is Good.

2010-07-01T01:27:00.000-07:00

Tabor tonight was fun. Really fun, even though it hurt. Maybe especially because it hurt.

Anyway, I found this video whilst digging back through Backyard Blam tonight. I really do love this blog and that outlook of its creator - Amanda. Her humor seriously warms my heart in the nerdiest of nerdy ways. Plus, she recently gifted me not only a matching set of glasses (but in brown) but also a Backyard Blam T-shirt that I am thinking you might be seeing soon (on me, and not anywhere else - I choose to believe that this shirt is so rare as to be considered a "one off.") So, keep your eyes peeled for that one.

I want this. At first I did not. I poo pooed it. I am not going to lie to you. But, the more I think about it. The more I think it has something to do with the model and the legwarmers and all the dark on the lower half. Just being honest here. But, I've changed my mind and now I want it. It looks hot (as in Super Cool) and now I want one. Curses. And I cannot wait to see the inclusion of the Tourmalet back into the TDF this year. Schlecks Schlecks! You can do it. I think this also has something to do with why I am all of a sudden psyched about this jersey.

The other thing that I want. Since we are on the subject of clothing and wanting at the moment -- Is something from Howies. Anything will do really when it comes down to it. They just do their clothing so well. It is like a hip, functional Patagonia. But better looking. However, with that being said, word on the street (and I have an inside man everywhere) is that the fall Patagonia line is going to blow your crampons right off. Just sayin.

The other reason I am into Howies these days is (not because I heard two really nice stories about their company and how they treat people) but because they produce such great printed materials. When I was lingering around Mr. Strickland's office I picked up one of their little mini-catalog's to thumb through, turns out it was just a little side project book about all of the cool spots that they had been whilst shooting their actual catalog. Why do more companies not do stuff like this? This is what the people (ie - me) want to see. Have a look see.

I got thinking about this one again because of the Embrocation 2.5 that came up the other day. I like these small little nuggets. Little awesome packets of the joy that it took to produce them. I think that there might be a 6.5 in the future. Or something to that effect.

231: When the Morning Comes.

2010-06-29T23:00:00.001-07:00

I promised myself that this will only be the length of one beer. Well, there is two swigs left and it is pretty warm at this point. In fact, I am not going to lie, it is kicked.

That is all I have got at this point.

Watch the video below. I know I know, I'm late to the game, but what? I took a break and got inspired. I like that this video uses the sheer genius of the Rube Goldberg, which was another favorite in the Dan Dunn arsenal of cool shit to know. Also, was how to toss an egg off the roof of the school without damaging it.

One take. The whole film cycles through on one take. Or appears to. And I can guarantee that you will find something new every time. Note the State Farm Insurance truck that kicks off the whole Rube Goldberg. Apparently this has been garnering OK Go a lot of attention for its bold drastic take on product placement. Note the "OK Go Thanks State Farm for making this possible" at the end.

I love that this band will never run out of great video ideas. Thanks OK Go.

The video that it instantly brought to mind was this Michel Gondry music video called "Lucas with the Lid Off". For a couple reasons. One of them being the format of the frame and how it moved through the video with the action. The other for its sheer ingenuity (and Solo Take on the action). This was the one thing that fascinated me more than anything in film school. The opening of Touch of Evil (I've talked about this before right?) and the Royal Tenenbaum's ending. So good. But, what they do really well in the above OK Go one is seal the fact that this is a production by showing us the people behind the scenes in the final shot. I get that the whole thing is behind the scenes, but I mean the people making sure that everything is running smoothly behind the camera.

You get little snippets, glimpses of the genius of the action in the Gondry one, but it mostly comes from the main character, who, similar to the band members of OK Go keep re-appearing. Gondry deliberately shows us shots of equipment (cameras etc) but the entirety of the This Too Shall is the background. Everything is revealed in the unfolding of the Goldberg Machine. Whew, this is exhausting and way more than a beers worth. Even a tall Olympia. Know why?

Because there is more.

And here is the really strange part. There is another official video. I read through this letter from OK Go where they break down how the Music Industry works - for them - and then they gave a link to a website where you could watch the video for their new single and this is it. Apparently this was actually the first video that they released for their most recent album in January...

Oh Wikipedia how I love you so.

In any case there was one little section of the letter that seemed to make some sense. It went like this:

That moment – the dawn of internet video – is gone. The internet isn’t as anarchic as it was then. Now there are Madison Avenue firms that specialize in “viral marketing” and the success of our videos is now taught in business school. But here's a secret: zillions of hits was never the point. We're a rock band, and it’s a great gig. Not just because we get to snort drugs off the Queen of England (we do), but because the only thing we are expected to do is make cool stuff. We chase our craziest ideas for a living, and if sharing those ideas takes 40 websites instead of one, it doesn’t make too big a difference to us.

Well, thanks again guys. For being crazy, awesome, and honest. And a welcome distraction to the question of "Who's going to win the Tour de France?" Because, we all know that it is going to be A. Schleck. Or Contador. I can't decide. King of Spain? Or the Lads from Luxe?

Are there any good Tour de France T-Shirts that are going to be rocked for this extravaganza?

Ok, back to work there are fucking magazines to make people.

230: Two Point Five

2010-06-28T23:33:00.000-07:00

I read on the Velocepede Salon that someone was looking for Volumes 1 and 2 of Embrocation the other day. That made me smile, for a moment, but then it made me cringe in horror as to what they might think when they saw them. The really fun one was the next person to respond that he even had Volume 2.5 and that it was a "smaller supplement that was issued because there was so much time between 2 & 3. " Anyway, here is the post if you want to see it (or have some early Embrocations that you want to give to the person in want.)

It made me think about that issue, 2.5. And that it did come out for just those reasons. I wanted to make something quick and dirty and get it out fast. All the content was there at that point, but it still needed to happen. I think it might have been our man Gustavo (whom you will see more of later this week) who really put it to us to do this "supplement" - what a great word. The whole of the 250 issues that were printed fit into my backpack - almost- I had to carry one box. But, it really does not matter at that point, when you are riding that one home. Weight, it really is not on your back, or shoulders at that point.

There are a few original pieces in that little guy though, and when I opened it up, there were more than I remembered. What did I remember about the whole situation was this: I needed to get an issue done, something - anything before I went over to Belgium to hang out with Molly and see the racing scene there. I knew that trip would spawn, or spurn, or spurt a whole mess of new content and if I did not get this stuff out (to keep going) that would not be good - all these stories piling up on top of one another.

But it was also an exercise in getting something done. In film school my friend Alex had this quote, and he used it all the time, with whatever he was working on. It went something like this:
No matter what you are working on, if you see the project through to its completion, whatever that is, it cannot be a failure. I'm paraphrasing it, or at least getting the wording wrong, but it really has been one of these monikers that sticks by. When you get to that point where you struggle with something, throw your hands up and go "Why the fuck am I doing this anyway." That is when I remember Alex. (He now makes actual films - about Uganda - in Uganda).

Jesse Lalonde did the above piece. It is about him breaking his shoulder over a barrier in Wisconsin. He does all the rad rad design coming out of the Trek world these days (that might be a bit of hyperbole as I do not know that for certain.) However, I do think that he did all the new Gary Fischer stuff. That is a good thing. He did the Lucador Shirt for us. Could possibly be my favorite Embrocation Shirt we have produced over the years.

This one got me in trouble. Not because I used the quote, but because it got misconstrued somehow. I wrote it down one night when we were talking late and drunken one night. Everyone was still basking in that post race glow that is easily enhanced by a few alcoholic beverages. The tongue was a little loose on just how awesome racing cyclocross is and Megan cut in with one of her usual hilarious and awesomely biting soundbites.

There was this. Words To Live By by Chris DiStefano. You could put together a whole book just based around the serious wisdom of this man. Someday (when he stops saying "you cannot print what I just said.") I'll compile that book. Until then, you are left with this. And since we are talking about CD, we might as well transition right into ZD. Zac put together this little start list that I am hoping is going to be used with the entirety of the MFG Cyclocross Series this year. Especially the "Vanilla Ice T-Shirt" Category.

Ok, two more and I promise I will stop boring you with these things. The first one (below) is a photo of the always beautiful Queen of New England Cyclocross (just made that up) Maureen Bruno Roy. I think I took this one at Gloucester a couple years ago and it is a great photo because she is beautiful. But wait! There is more. Check out Richard Sachs' brooding look to the far right - Awesome! Then, to really capitalize on not only the New England Scene, but also the three full on Cross Era's that are represented there is one of the Keough's (Jake?) in the far left - presumably waiting to crush some unsuspecting Junior. Also, how did I not know that Mo was putting recipes out into the world?

Ok, almost done. The one that first popped into my head was this one. Mark McCormack and I were talking about it on the B2B ride a couple weeks ago. He had/has been writing some Training Tips and tricks for people getting ready for the B2B. Awesome event by the way. But Mark did this little piece for me about riding Sand. Which in terms of layout and everything turned out to be one of pieces that I have done over the years (years?)...

The little book was just an experiment. It was half the size of Embrocation and the print quality was not nearly as nice(honestly, I think Comp Cyclist was a little bummed.) But, on the other hand it fits neatly into a jersey pocket and has a few snapshots that were not included elsewhere. So, if you have one that is pretty great because the one above is the only one that I've got.

On Writing, Right?

2010-06-15T19:28:00.000-07:00

I have a problem with the word "no." On the other hand, I do not have a problem with the word "yes." Or depending on how you look at it maybe I just have problems all the way around?

I cannot say "no" to anything. This has been a problem in the past. Would I be interested in starting this bike racing team? Travel around the country and race bikes and possibly drink beers with my own band of merry men? Hell Yes! Would I like to go out for drinks? Well, yes, is the appropriate answer to that one as well. Be damned, work, or anything else that should get in the way of these leisurely activities. Should we fly to Panama to go rock climbing for three weeks? The answer, again, was — but of course.

This has also helped me to have some of the best, craziest experiences that one could imagine. They are not all good, that is not the way things work. But they are all something, I know that much to be true.

Without agreeing to certain things you will never find yourself in the back of a pickup truck staring at the Andes over your own shoes (with the caribineros de Chile shaking their fists at you.) You will also probably never find yourself naked from the waist up on an operating table in another in a third world country getting moles removed. One does not blow up boulders with hand molded nitro-glycerin, while chewing cacao, by saying "no thank you." And you certainly can not take shots of tequila from the business end of a glass shotgun by saying "I think I'll pass." Just sayin.

The point of this little word "yes" is to illustrate exactly how I found myself in Bill Strickland's Bicycling Magazine office one fine day early this summer. This, in fact, is where these photos come from. And if you leave me in your office alone, long enough, I will photograph most of it.

His wife Beth had put it to me a few days earlier that I should come down and see the opening night of the Lehigh Valley Velodrome with them. We had just finished up the Rapha East Coast Gentleman's Race (the full video comes out July 1st) and I did not think it fair to say "no" to such a lovely lady after she had just ridden 120 miles. Plus, it was promised that I could see the prestigious offices of Bicycling Magazine, possibly get a little drunk, and definitely enjoy everything that is organic and edible from the food stand at the track. How, pray tell, do you say "no" to something like that? Besides, I had kept the drink going for maybe two, three nights now, what was a little bus ride for one more before returning to the West?

Now, with that being said, there were other things on the agende that I wished to explore while in Emmaus, PA. Neither of them had to do with Mr. Armstrength either. If you know what I mean, well, one of them did, but only in a sort of round about way. A tertiary text that came from the real truth here. Bill Strickland is a writer. And as someone who has the sort of inkling to do the same, well, I wanted to know what it takes, or took. The other? Well, the other is a little harder to pin down than that (because what it takes to be a writer is totally easy to pin down.)

So, that is how I found myself sitting in Bill's office. A little adventure, sure, I'm always up for that….but as far as I knew I was On Assignment, and if I did not keep my wits about me, as I would later see, I would easily be making the half mile trek from the velodrome to a huge house situated a mile down the road.

Now the first thing that we did NOT do upon arriving at the prestigious Bicycling Magazine was to talk about Tour de Lance. The book has been getting reviews all over the board. Mostly good, but there will always be some detractors. And that is fine. The subject, I could care less about, (sorry L, I don't mean that as a direct slam to you, I'm sure you're 'totes aws' [read: totally awesome]) what I was more interested in was the simple fact that a book had been written. Seriously! A whole book. And what's more? It is good. It makes sense. You read it from cover to cover and...wait for it... it tells a story.

I do not know many writers that have written books. (Do I?) A unpublished cycling romance novel, sure. Great rides and routes in the Portland area, yes. Wait, I have to take that back a little bit, my friend Lesley wrote a book called Dear Diary about being an adolescent girl and having a drug habit (or three). So, there is that.

Bill also edited this book On Being a Writer, which, obviously I have become totally fascinated with. Know why? Want to know why? Because, in it, he interviews Tom Robbins. Yes, that Tom Robbins. Tom Fucking Robbins. Remember him? You told that girl that you had a crush on that you actually read Still Life with Woodpecker to impress her, then went out and found it just in case she question you on it? That Robbins.

The first Tom Robbins book I read was Fierce Invalids Home from Hot Climates. I stole it from my aunt and read it on the beach (after she finished it of course) and I remember a strangeness coming over me. I was now witness to the world that my parents and their siblings had been/were a part of, but never talked about. For example, if I was off belly down in the sand enjoying HST (Hunter S. Thompson) then they were joking to each other about how cute I was with my new tattoos and quest for edgy writing, all the while gobbling up anything T. Robbins had to offer.

AND Bill was out traveling to Seattle to interview him. Damn, that is what I call a writer. On assignment. For Playboy, or Rodale, or a gunslinger for hire. It does not matter.

He (and we're back talking about Bill here) gets to travel the world and interview cyclists. Or rather stand beside their buses and observe what they're doing. Maybe mark it all down in a notebook, maybe sneak behind a building or two to mark it down in a notebook. But either way - He's Doing It! And I will not ever stop applauding him for that. No matter how much he has resigned himself to not travel this year (I do it out of envy - sorry.)

Rouleur 18 is a pretty damn good example of this. (and if you have made it this far I applaud you). On the first page of writing, in what will go down in history as one of my favorite Rouleur's yet Strickland has written this...

At the finish, I walk among the racers like a human among wraiths, wondering what it means to me, for me, for all of us that they have done this to themselves once again. I don't like to talk to them then, though some of them want to. I watch. I take notes I rarely use. There is almost no way to write it right.

And this, is pretty much how I feel every day. I travel to events like the tour of California and get caught up in talking to a bartender that is struggling to comprehend what is happening around her (what? she was cute) or all the way to Ghent to see the fabled Tour of Flanders and am content enough to watch it from the corner of a bar, and then I feel bad about it. But it is writing like this - like the Tour de Lance, or pretty much anything coming from Rouleur (however haughtily) that gives me a little bit of hope.

I guess that is probably what I found that day, sitting with Bill and reading over a cartoon about Lance, pretending that I was helping him edit, while really just wallowing in where I was. Hope. Inspiration. Maybe a touch of nostalgia that left me wondering, "where is this nostalgia coming from?"

And after all that. All that thinking and pondering. Then we went to the Velodrome. Which, I guess is just a nice way of saying 'To Be Continued."

228: Designers Don't Read Books About Cycling

2010-06-14T00:34:00.000-07:00

Have I made it apparent that I like books? Too much? Well, this one is about books as well. And if my calculations are correct (and I'm getting my calculations from Amazon) then today June 15th is the big day. Comic books used to come out on Tuesdays and I would run to the store to get them. Luckily, I am a bit more internet savvy these days, so I do not have to do any running.

I have been reading this book lately Designers Don't Read which I guess is mostly true, but it is probably because they are too hung up on the kerning of this, or whether all those text boxes line up or they have just been staring at the computer screen too long? (Joke)

Anyway, the book, by fellow Portland resident Austin Howe, is broken down into neat essays on various and sundry subjects. Each one of them has a title, but also a secondary header that is the minutes it takes to read the essay. I wonder how they came up with these numbers? The essays began as emails sent out to Howe's favorite designers around the country and ended up becoming this book. And most of them are really good. However, I keep coming back to one at the end. Admittedly, I've only read a few at the beginning and a few at the back. But the below snippet is something that I have been applying to everything that I have been seeing since reading it.

"Art" is the intersection of craft and self-awareness.

It works for everything. Literally. Let us say for a moment that bike racing is indeed Art. That at its highest levels these athletes are performing this insane balancing act that is the craft of their sport intermingled with the self awareness it takes to handle being at that level. But, I think that I will get back to that at some point in the near future.

Today, if it is indeed the 15th, would also happen to be the release date of Mr. Strickland's new book The Tour de Lance. And I think that the two books are related. Do yourself a favor cycling fans and get this book. Actually, get them both, support these literary arts.

I do not usually take notes when I read books. Sometimes, if I am feeling exceptionally rude, and only when I own the book myself, I will write something in the book itself. Or make a little dash or something to remind me later, when looking back through the book that there was something that caught my eye, held my interest for a minute longer, or stood out in the way that it was written. However, this time I kept notes. Furiously scribbled on an Ace Hotel Notepad, lining my own journal and even in the book, I took notes.

The tough thing about them is that my notes, especially if they are written in the height of passion, are almost totally illegible. They look sometimes like Ralph Steadman drawings without the lizards and dinosaurs. And at one point I wrote "FUCK YES" and circled that and drew and arrow towards something that looks like "Beelzebub is in the teamcar." Chew on that one for a minute. (That is not written anywhere in the book, I assure you.)

About a week before I received the book I got a call from Rich Bravo. Now, I don't know if you know this, because I give Rich Bravo a lot of shit, but, not only is he one of the smartest people I know, but he also knows his shit when it comes to books and literature...and writing...and the Classics (which is what he studied in College.)

"I'm reading Bill's new book." He says this to me in a fairly frank manner, maybe knowing that on the other side of the phone I'm clenching my fists in sheer jealousy, maybe not.

"Yeah? How is it?" I respond, obviously hiding my disappointment that I am not reading Bill's new book.

"Well, lets just put it this way, if Bill were a journalist in Vietnam instead of for Cycling and the Tour de France, he would win a Pulitzer for this." This statement coming from anyone else would make me laugh. "Tell me more." I say casually. "I don't know, you will have to read it, but I think what he does best, is not only make the subject accessible to everyone, but the insertion of his own personality into the story is so great that it gives it another dimension." DING — Intersection of Craft and Self-Awareness = Art.

The first weekend that I got the book I went for a long ride. It was sometime in March, but we had an unusually sunny and balmy day here in Portland. I had read the first few paragraphs of the book right before I left, standing awkwardly in the dining room of our house, probably making everyone else late in the process. These first few paragraphs (arguably the most important in the book) where he describes Armstrong's 2009 TT in Monaco at the start of the Tour de France would not leave me for the entirety of my ride.

And when I got home, stripped down to just bib shorts - their straps hanging down - and maybe one sock- and the same spot in the dining room is where I stood and finished the next few chapters.

It struck me a few days later that this book was going to mean something. That it would mean something more than a book about a Cancer survivor, or one of the greatest athletes ever to have lived, because at the base of it, really when he gets in and starts digging (by not digging) you will see that Lance has started to become human. That, as much as he works to fend it off, it still creeps in to everything that he does.

Now, I'm reading back over the last few paragraphs and I keep thinking "But you haven't said anything about the book." Like, an excerpt or something to really convince people that this really is the Bees Knees, as they say. I used a couple excerpts earlier this year, and that image of Menchov, the dying lion, is not one easily forgotten.

There is another one that I wrote down near the Menchov quote that was a such a good description of an exploding pack that I re-read it instantly. And have maybe thought of it a few times in races, whilst moving through a group of riders.

We drove up beside Morabito, the Swiss Astana rider. "We have to keep going," Craig said. We had to drive until we saw Lance. The gap to the break was down to 1:18. The pack seemed to be like a sack open on its downhill side and spilling out its contents as it got dragged upwards. We passed great great groups of riders, whose stench floated behind them...

It is these sweeping descriptions of the bike races that we (I) want to see and feel firsthand that make this account great. It is amazing to see the dirt under the fingernails of the riders (and writers), the gummy sharks that are the secret passage to the underworld that is professional cycling, and ultimately, the people surrounding the greatest cycling empire ever to have lived.

What I am really curious is to see what YOU think of the book.

Apparently, Mr. Armstrength himself was not fond of the book and his furrowed brow, as we all know, casts a wide net. Or however that phrase goes? I honestly kept a keen eye out for anything that could possibly harm the reputation of the golden child whilst reading.

The only thing that I could think that this book possibly does that would put a chink in the Armstrong armor? It makes him look human. And I think that is the one thing he is afraid of. Because, as soon as he's human, then he is just like the rest of us. And really? Who wants that?

227: Too Beef.

2010-06-07T18:58:00.000-07:00

I put that photo first to draw you in. The thing you want to do with readers is draw them in. Lead with their eyeballs, your eyeball. Naked women. Works does it not? It is story #2 on the day. We will get to it. Do not worry. But, just a note. If you are looking at this blog post with your 1o year old, you might want to start the "What's a Stripper?" conversation right now.

It is books books books (and mags) these days. Usually it goes bikes bikes bikes, but something happened and I started reading again. But the thing is, I forgot is to tell you all about them because I was reading them. Out loud. Sometimes I get too caught up on this "real life" stuff and forget to, you know "pass it on."

New Bike

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I did get a new bike recently. See how the white tape glows? See the urban environs that I found to showcase this beast? It is a Ridley Helium. It has SRAM Red on it. Apparently, the Embrocation Team deemed me necessary to add to their ranks. And after said approval - new bike. So nice. Keep your eyes wide open for the review that will follow after a week of racing on it. We have PIR tomorrow and then Tabor on Wednesday, followed by the Mississippi Crit on Saturday. Cannot think of a better way to get back into shape.

I was very, very excited to pick it up at the Veloshop where Jake had assembled it for me. They do nice work there, have I mentioned that before? This town is not lacking in the ye olde bike shoppe department. The only problem when I went to pick up my new Murder Machine (that is what I had been calling it in private) was that I had been trumped by ANOTHER RIDLEY HELIUM. And you know what? I don't like being fucking shown up like that. I mean here I was picking up my brand new bike, which, if I can speak for myself, and I can, is pretty fucking awesome. And I get shown up by another bike, nay, the same bike, but done up better. What the eff is up with that?

Sorry for the swears.

"Beef don't come with a radio edit."

I'm looking into said bike. I'll get back to you. All I know at the moment is that it was stripped and repainted and then some Golden Screeching Eagle Di2 was added to it. Some fancy Edge Rims were strapped on and now I'm left looking like a sucker on the street. I am actually thinking that these two bikes might need to meet, on the streets, and settle this once and for all.

I got your Portland Bike Stud right here.

On Reading

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Speaking of Beef. Here are some books and Magazines that I've read recently. Let me know if something that I have not covered jumps out at you and I will try to get back to it. Seriously. Serrrriously. If it jumps out at you, it is probably because you think you might be into it. And I'm into that. But before you get too far into this... there has been a lot of reading and writing going round on just this subject. Even to an immense degree on these actual books. My pal Brian has been doing a great job of talking about publications and I would have never heard of some of them if I did not check thewashingmachinepost (what? he doesn't capitalise anything.) And there is a great piece there about Richard Sachs' New Yorker Collection.

Books:
Come and Gone by Joe Parkin — see below.

Tour de Lance by Bill Strickland — this one is no joke. I'm not even joking on the no joke thing. Order your copy on Amazon right now. I'll get back to it in a minute, but until then you will have to wait for the book report on this one.

Shop Class as Soul Craft by Matthew B. Crawford
The Official CIA Manual of Trickery and Deception
The Rum Diary by Hunter S. Thompson (read this every summer)
Our Story Begins by Tobias Wolff
The Best American Sports Writing of the Century
Ask the Dust by John Fante
Outliers by Malcom Gladwell

Mags and Papers:
Jacques
Monocle
Huck
Little White Lies (sister to Huck)
Inventory
Rouleur #17
Rouleur #18
ROAD
Wired
Bicycle Quarterly
Home and Away

Come and Gone
by Joe Parkin

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When you have troubles figuring out something you turn to your friends right? Apparently my friends then turn to Zombie movies as reference, which, I think, just goes to show that I have some pretty good friends.

Come and Gone is a snippet of bicycle racing from someone that was on the inside. And this is important, I think, and necessary. It makes me hopeful, that people are telling stories about bicycle racing in America. I for one, was not there, but I would still like to learn and hear about these things that happened. That shaped the culture of bike racing and molded it into what we see now before us.

It is also my hope that as these stories come out and people start telling them that they will just get better and better. This is where the Zombie movie reference comes in. No one thinks that Zombie movies are going to win Oscars. Some people do, but they aren't. And as Clint said tonight "Zombie movies are just about coming up with new and creative ways of killing the undead." So, I say this with Zombies in my heart and tears of the undead stinging eyes. This is not a good book.

I hope that you understand that I understand what it means to say that. I think that this book is very important, just not very good.

With A Dog in a Hat Parkin opened up and offered us a peak in through the doors of a world that most of us will never see. And it was such an exclusive look, into a time and place that anyone with any aspiration towards PRO was willing to overlook terrible writing to hold onto a little piece of that. This one is a less effusive glance into a world that Parkin was barely a part of. And I know that sounds harsh, but I think that is because he did not want to be a part of it. He wanted to stay in Belgium and tell the stories of the World Champion Road Racers that he met, of the World Championships that he raced in.

And now he is the editor of BIKE magazine. So, we shall see how that goes. Although I have to admit I'm curious about this post from April. One issue about Belgium. Ok, I'm listening.

Jacques Magazine
Brooklyn, NY

-----------------------------------------------

"America's new Erotic Quarterly." Who could turn down a tagline like that? I admit, the thing that first sparked my curiosity were the video promos that Jacques does to accompany their issues. They are well shot, and they are, well, hot.

Squash, the Sports Issue Trailer.
These are totally safe for work, if whatever you do for work is awesome.

The thing is, I like that someone is putting this together. The stories inside are laced with humor, and women's underwear, and at the same time they are interesting, and a little heartbreaking. The Girls of Mons Venus, a strip club in Tampa, FL, tells the stories of the girls that work there.
And 37 year old Tamara has had cervical cancer and has to have more tumors removed, but she keeps working, because that is how you make money, by working.

The design, layout and format of the publication is great. It is great because in an airbrushed world of stick skinny fake boobed models it is apparent that that these are real people. They are real people in their full selves, they come alive in their awkward acknowledgments of the sex trades that they ply. And they are real people that want to be sexy for you.

The large print format gives it more than ample opportunity to do just that as well. In a time where magazines are being shrunk (Alpinist?) and distilled Jacques stands out once again. At the same time it tends to stand out if you leave it lying on your desk at work for weeks at a time. The other great aspect (besides the naked girls, cool format, and accompanying videos) about Jacques is that it is cheap. Or relatively so. So, you know, support the arts. Get one.

226: On Gentlemen.

2010-05-31T23:05:00.000-07:00

What does it mean to be a Gentleman?

This is something that was discussed by my father and I quite often. Not sure if he ever came right out and said that "This is what it means to be a Gentleman," or if he has ever actually said the word "Gentleman" before in his life. But, at the same time, you know what I mean right?

Things he actually said:
-Treat your mother like the head of the household/center of authority that she is and we won't have any problems.
-Always be nice to people. Or at least try really hard to be.
-Being in love with yourself too much is not very attractive (I think this has something to do with self-awareness)
-Play fair, but play often.
-It is better to be lucky than good. And that was usually followed up by a sly smile that said "but it is possible to make your own luck, if you know what you're doing."

My Dad, or Dan, if you prefer, is the man that taught me about sportsmanship and how to generally "live well" but he also taught, or tried to teach me about woodworking, house fixing, and photography (my first Photoshop teacher). How to properly mow the grass and trim the yard to be pleasing to the eye? Yes, that too, along with optimal speaker placement with a new hi-fi stereo system. Breakfast yogurt smoothies or perfect pancakes? How to make food while camping (foil dinners anyone?) Pay attention here, this is life-lesson type stuff. Of course Dan also taught me about girls, but if we start to delve into that specific a subject we could be here for slightly longer than you or I have time for. So, I like to think that he was doing all of this with the "How to be a Gentleman" theme lightly tapping around in the back of his head. He was also the one who taught me a good deal about the mystery of women, but that is a much longer story (although still applicable.)

But, if I had to sum up what my father has taught me about being a Gentleman it would be this sentence. And it should be noted that I just made it up now. Being a Gentleman is about making the very best of each and every situation. I will try to boil it down a little bit in the coming weeks to see if something better, more precise, more tweetable comes of it. I'll let you know.

How is any of this applicable you are wondering? Well, on a not too recent, but not too distant (ok, it was two weeks ago) weekend was this years East Coast version of the Rapha Gentleman's Race. So, as you can see, Gentle-men were on the brain.

Of course the whole ordeal went off without a hitch. There were people chipping in left and right to help out on the course, and maybe get a heckle or two under their belts on the way? Not sure, I was only one man in one vehicle (murdered out at that) but I am almost certain that when I bumrushed the first checkpoint I heard some laughter and I'm almost certain I saw some of the drinking that makes the laughter all the more loud and amazing.

It was not possible for me to be at every point on the course at all times. But when I rushed back to the Start/Finish after spending a good four or five or six hours chasing that race around I was ready to be done with this. The day was already long, and standing there at the finish and waiting for friends and compatriots from two different teams put me in what I like to call a 'sour mood.'

However, if that feeling was not dispelled by a man playing bagpipes for the winning teams' entrance to the finishing area, then it was certainly washed away by seeing the next four, five, six teams hugging each other at the finish. I admit it was not always a hug, sometimes it was a stern handshake, or a high five that would leave a mark. But in each form of expression it was not so much the act, but the symbol behind it that meant something. And I think that this praise could be important. That Gentlemen/Women should praise the others in whose company they keep. For your friends and compatriots to know not only how well you are working together but also that you enjoy their company is an important piece of the puzzle. I mean we are in this together right?

But the thing that I am curious about is this; my ways and thoughts only have to do with my own upbringing. With my crazy, athletic, and completely hilarious father at the helm anything could happen, but he was only helming the ship that my Sister, Mother and I happened to be traveling on. Ok, he was a teacher so there is a chance that he did some extra white water rafting with a few others (readers?) But, I am thinking that his cannot and is not the only way to live this lifestyle...

So, my question is this.

What does it mean to be a Gentleman, or a Gentlewoman?

225: More Rally

2010-05-20T21:59:00.000-07:00

We should talk about anything but bike racing at this moment. That is my feeling anyway. We have been sitting in the back of a vehicle talking about Flandis/L'armstrong all day. And then we took a break for 10 minutes to buy the biggest sandwiches I have ever seen, and then went back to talking about the situation. The one thing that I will say, that was the most honest thing I have seen all day came from Mr. Joe Staples when he said (and I am paraphrasing here) that he was simply going to take bicycle racing for face value from now on — "performance art." And really when you get down to brass tacks (and think about football, basketball, soccer, and baseball) that is really what we are doing anyway, just watching some pretty intense performance art. Ok, that is it, I am done. For now.

Moving on. If you get the chance to see some Rally Racing this summer you should do that. This past weekend Joe and I went out to PIR to watch the opening night of the Oregon Trail Race that happens in Oregon every year. Was particularly interested because Adam Craig and Carl Decker were taking a minute out of their World Cup Mountain Biking careers to put the pedal to the metal (so to speak.)

Cindy Lewellen was the one that introduced Joe and I to these two. Well, Adam and I met at Nationals last year, but that is another story. Any tension that might have been in the air was quickly dispersed by the bubbly personality that is their Pit Crew and takes the shape of the ever vivacious Tina Brubaker (surprise!). Who knew that not only is Tina a bike racer extraordinaire, but that she also runs a pretty tight ship when it comes to results handling, making sure that they are at their car when the race is about to start, and just generally keeping people amped? I will let you in on a little secret, it involves drinking lots of NOS energy drink, and I implore you - stay well away from that stuff. It is the devil's juice.

Now, my only experience with these races has been in a smattering of Youtube videos curated by one Kyle. Apparently he has more experience in the ways of these things than myself, so I jumped at the chance to not only check out this other world, but to see how two Mountain Bikers handle themselves in this realm. And really, they do handle themselves quite well, because despite not having the best equipment in the game. Note the year of their car in the screengrab below, now compare it to the others on the page. Yet, these two still manage to hold their own when it comes to these other super charged NOS-mobiles(I think that they have a dual purpose for this liquid - to burn holes in stomachs and fuel cars). And my guess is that is has something to do with how well they not only work together, but their drive to compete, no pun intended.

It is hard to discern really how they got into this game. Carl because of his father, who taught most of the State Troopers in Oregon how to defensively handle their cars when on the chase. Adam because, well, the best answer I could get was that he was not too tall and did not get car sick when shouting out directions to Carl in a 120 mph car racing through the desert. Which seems like a good enough reason for me. And not to mention that he spent a good amount of time perusing what looked to be literally hundreds of pages of notes on turns.

The scene itself is one that is worth noting I would think. It is something like a mix of Belgian Cyclocross and American Motocross (also something that I have no experience with - apparently there is something called Vintage Motocross as well) the smell of what I imagined to be fuel mixed with burning tires and brake fluid permeated everything and lingered in the nostrils long after we left and I was left sitting in front of the computer looking at photos and hearing the racing somewhere deep in my ears.

SIDE NOTE:

The funniest scenario of the night was when Joe grabbed the poster of Ken Block and held it up so that I could shoot it with the actual car in the background. A guy saw this happen and needed one for himself. The funny thing was that he made his child work his camera phone so that he (the adult in the situation) could get a photo of himself. He was very pleased. Not sure if the son was or not? But I figured the right thing to do was to take a photo.

224: Rally

2010-05-14T23:41:00.001-07:00

223: In and out of Love.

2010-05-11T22:49:00.000-07:00

There was an opening in the field at the races tonight. One of those that happens really quickly. Someone brakes, or touches someone's handlebars and that jittery dance begins rather quickly. I found myself thinking about jumping into that hole, something that I had just done a bit earlier in the night. But I paused for a second and this thought filled my head. That hole just opened up because someone in there lost his nerve.

The moment passed almost as quickly as it had come. But for some reason it came back when I sat down to band this out. I guess that means it is worth noting, or at the very least, getting out.

This does not always happen and it frustrates me. I spend countless hours on the bike and there is not much to do there except listen to yourself. Talk to yourself and listen to yourself, or at least hope to hell that you are listening. But there are some pretty golden ideas that come out of this and I remember only snippets of them. A fragment of a good idea is somewhere to start, not ideal, but still good.

I have tried all different ways of getting these thoughts out to no avail. The Rite In the Rain ("tired of mushy notes?") books did not work so good because you still have to stop to write anything legible. And the voice recorder did not work either because I sweat like a - well, a - pig in heat? Not really sure what kind of image that conjures for you, but it is fair to say that it is something really sweaty. Like rubber suited high school wrestlers trying to cut weight. Sweaty enough for you?

I sweated so much this weekend past that my eyelids felt foreign. The uppers on them were sticking in a strange but not entirely uncomfortable way. They felt disconnected from everything that was happening. But maybe it had something to do with the 8 mile climb that was causing them to sweat so profusely? Anything is possible on those god forsaken backroads. And just as a little side note. If there is something named "the Wall" on your next ride decide early whether you are going to do that fucker or not. Hopefully you go for it, but do not go lightly into that battle, trust me you will make it. And then you will know why they call it "the Wall."

The Tour of the Unknown Coast has to be one of the harder 100 mile rides that I have done. I do not dare say that this is the toughest ride ever. But, it could be pretty damn close.

Due to a mishap at the start (overshot alarm? dogs on the loose? mouths on the loose?) Cole and I missed the start of the ride and proceeded to "chase" back on from there. Which really amounted to riding with each other and a few hundred other people along the way. But that just meant that there was more time for Cole to spit out tweets (he really can talk 140 characters at a time). And for us to meet some interesting characters along the way. That and fall in and out of love. It was great.

Things I Fell In Love With On the Tour of the Unknown Coast

1. Cycling
2. Riding with the Rapha Continental
3. Sleeping in Tents
4. A College Girl Who Climbs Like an Angel with a Blue Lightning Bolt on her Jersey
5. Redwoods
6. Long Climbs
7. Jaw Harp Music
8. Aaron Erbeck and Tony Pereira's Laughs
9. The Girl in the White T-shirt
10. Ice Cream after long days
11. DJ Quick
12. California Sunshine
13.
14. My Richard Sachs Roadbike

Things I Fell Out of Love With On the Tour of the Unknown Coast

1. Cycling (don't worry it was only on the long climbs)
2. Early Start Times
3. Sleeping on the ground
4. Dave Roth's Snoring
5. Cafeteria Food
6. Pizza in Northern California
7. Hippies

I guess it is probably a good thing that the good outweighs the bad? I really wish that we could do this every weekend. But there is all those lives to rush back to.

222: Riding Weekends are Awesome.

2010-05-10T00:44:00.001-07:00

221: By Stick or by Carrot.

2010-05-03T18:43:00.000-07:00

It is not often that I get to see the whole of the Embrocation Cycling Journal Team race their bikes. It is not that I do not want to, just the whole Midwest gets in the way sometimes. So, when a freak volcano blows up and ruins everyone's plans for international travel you get to find yourself in some new situations. Coming "home"(there's that word again) is always a fun thing to do, if only because you get to see things that somehow feel incredibly relevant and totally ridiculous at the same time.

Such was the case with the Turtle Pond Race. Which, oddly enough I was able to participate in. I did not get to do this one last year. Or did I? But either way RMM's greeting of "You're the X Factor" upon arrival was enough to remind me that I was home. Or at the very least confuse me and frustrate PVB into slaying the front end of a field unwilling to chase for a few laps. Which made me smile a lot and frustrated others. But PVB always makes me smile.

I had a Di2 Equipped Seven that kept chirping like a little Golden Eagle on the attack. Such a satisfying feeling to hear that chirp and know that it means it is doing something. Not exactly sure what, but something. Shifting probably, but it is too smooth to even decipher that much. Either way, that is my review. Smooth, golden, eagle-like, pass it on. The best part about it really was the ease at which you can shift while standing. Because I do that shit all the time (not really- but in all actuality, it is possible with this stuff.)

--------------------

Read Bill Strickland's recent Sitting In. And then tell me that you have not experienced this. I felt jabs of guilt mixed with nostalgia when I read it. I have probably yelled at a few newbies, I try not to, but I am sure that it has happened. Or maybe I just feel guilty for everyone when other people yell at newbies? I know that it is a necessary evil and, honestly, probably the quickest way to set them on the straight and narrow. But at the same time I know that I have been the newbie. And most likely, more than once.

It made me think back to that Tuesday Night World Champs ride that is, or was, put on by the Charles River Wheelmen, or the BRC, or whomever chooses to take ownership of that ride. The first time I showed up (Don't laugh - ok, laugh) it was wearing a Descente reissue 7-Eleven Jersey. Holy shit did I think I was the coolest fucker out there. Did not even matter that I could have tucked that thing in my shorts or that I would not be thinking I was cool as I limped home by myself a mere 20 or 30 minutes later. All that mattered were those first few moments of awesome.

On the way to the ride my riding partner had told me that I needed to get out of the big ring. This early in the season was for spinning and I should be in the little chainring doing just that. I was pretty new to it all at this point, especially the gears part and at this point I remember feeling that there was just so much more to think about with this version of the sport than Single Speed Mountain biking or just riding your bike to work. In any case he knew more than me so I promptly forced the left side of my 8 Speed shifter inward causing the chain to drop to the inner ring.

The only problem at this point, with this scenario, is that I never shifted back into that big ring. Not when we rolled out of the meeting spot. Which was fine as there was a bit of an uphill to begin with. Not even when we made that first left and started the long drag to the next turn. And that was probably ok too. Because at that point I was still keeping up. Sure, I must have looked the part with my legs all aflutter, but it didn't matter too much, because I was about to be dropped as soon as we hit the twisty back roads of Needham. I did not know that I was about to be dropped either. But the strong hand that calmly grabbed a fistful of my jersey and all but shoved me out the back of the group said otherwise.

I was mad at this man for not letting me into his club. Mad enough (or embarrassed) to dejectedly wander home on my own accord and not want to ever come back. Not understanding how an old man with old components and a dirty old tire stuffed under his saddle (a man with no helmet nonetheless!) was allowed to participate in whatever the hell went on past mile 10 out there, while I was, decidedly, not.

I went back eventually. But, at that point I had armed myself with a little bit more knowledge (once we get rolling then use your big ring - here's how to follow someone) and maybe a little "I'll show those guys" attitude too. But, inevitably they smashed me more times than not, and would probably do so again today. Each and every time though I learned something from those experiences. How to hold someone in a group when they dropped their chain. How to stand up on a climb and not eject your bike into the front wheel of the person behind you. And of course how to rotate through a paceline and keep keep it moving.

Maybe it is because I grew up in a household full of teachers? Surrounded by a community of teachers, but I hope, whether it be by stick or carrot that there is still some of this high paced, motion based, enrichment happening out there. My father would say things like "if you aren't learning something from it, then why are you doing it?" Which by cycling standards is the equivalent to "If you aren't moving forward you're getting shot out the back." So, there is always that.

220: The Shack and Other Interesting Tidbits.

2010-04-30T00:31:00.000-07:00

I saw these photos of Mr. Armstrength yesterday on the Tracko blog. And they caught my eye because they mentioned the name of our good pal Mr. James Selman of Weights and Pulleys at the end. But there seemed to be a bit of a question as to whether or not this is the case...

But I figured that I should get to the bottom of the matter. Indeed James Selman of Weights & Pulleys was the go to guy for the retro Shack kit that that they are using solely during the Tour of Gila. This very obviously worked as a great spot for them to sell shitloads of Mellow Johnny's (also designed by Selman) kits after last years race (which they did) so why not come back this year with something fresh?

This makes perfect sense. And so does that use of Selman for the Design end of things. I mean, sure, they gave the old designers at Nike a chance and look what they came up with? The Mayor of Boresville called, they want their team kits back. Seriously. James gets it. Just forgo or bypass or whatever the eff you need to do to get straight to James next time.

Now, here is the thing that gets me. Take a look at the kits in the photo. I get that you want to stick with some old school Motorola/Brooklyn Chewing Gum Scenario with the black shorts. In fact, I think that is pretty awesome. But why not go all out. Why are these guys wearing some of the traditional MJ's stuff and some not? What is up with that? Why can't we get everyone on the same page?

Also, I recently heard this term "Deck" come into play. Its not a new term by any stretch of the imagination. Kyle Smith used it this past weekend in James Morrison's house and I immediately knew that it was Marketing speak for something, but not what.

As lady luck would have it, Dan Sharp got "a deck" later in the evening, so he was able to show it to me in entirety. Apparently, in the speak, "a deck" is simply the series of photos or a short brief, but its focus is entirely on inspiration (interestingly, Dan's Deck contained some of his own photos, which was weird, but I guess not unheard of.) So, armed with my new knowledge of the system I questioned James on his deck. Yes you read that right.

Turns out he really didn't have one, or it was too long to send, I can't remember. But he did send me some of his own personal inspiration images. And it is pretty easy to see how things got sweet relatively quickly on the MJ's team up end of things. Love the whole big bubbly font scenario going on there.

His statement on the design and inspiration of the kit went like this:

We wanted to originally do a more seasoned, fresh RetroShack kit for the original RS kit, so the Gila gave us an opportunity to try it out. Inspired by the late 70s early 80s era per the old RadioShack mark. And using the alt Mellow Johnny's mark we had done based on muscle cars with the old Trek mark – thought about using DATSUN and Blue Ribbon Sports, but thought best otherwise. With those components, I looked to DeWolf in Vermeer and then kits of sem France-Loire, Fiat, Raleigh Creda, DAF Cote D'Or and of course, RDV in Brookly. Found what worked within the color palette & the various brand(s) / architecture... Keep it simple.

My only other question is this.

Did Lance just name the newest addition to the family Cinco? Like Cinco Technology from Tim and Erik (trying to give you the benefit of the doubt) possibly he meant the powertap replacement bottom bracket thingie...

ps...did I mention that James also designed the new Rapha/Speedvagen kits that everyone saw at the Nahbs show in Richmond, VA. So good.

219: Riding...

2010-04-22T21:30:00.000-07:00

I am not riding enough. My legs feel blurry. I like when these shots happen. Most of the time it is because my camera is permanently stuck on Macro (surprise) and I am trying to shoot something further away. But they still end up looking kind of interesting. As if the images were actually burned onto a negative somewhere. Which they are not.

At this point I could put up a bunch of photos about how much I have been riding, and with whom (and now that I mention it I probably will) but when I look at the photos it makes me feel like I have been riding enough, but I have not. Know how I know? Cannot sleep.

The riding on the East Coast seemed to start last week. Dan Sharp and I got in to "The City" as they say, and promptly went and picked up some bikes to ride. Simon went with us as well and we rode down the West Side Bike Highway.

Now, I have a tendency to get a little bit aggro. Or at least I always think that I am being overly aggressive, even when I do not know why. Maybe it has something to do with living on the East Coast for a number of years? You adapt. Like Ice-T did in that movie Surviving the Game. Remember that one? I sure do, because it was awesome. And that was me. Of course I have never been a homeless drunkard that turns into a deadly fighting machine, but there is still time for that.

And then got to Portland and went, "well, this is going to be easy." And it is. But it makes you just that oh so little bit softer. This is no more apparent then when some 80 year old lady with huge bags of feed (I have no idea what they were) cruises by the window of where you stand drinking Americano's (Quad.) That is when you realize that you have gotten soft. Or at least East Coast soft.

In any case, I had a good time pretending to ride bikes on the East Coast so far....Rich Bravo was certainly there. You could not miss him in that Pink Stowaway. Want. Seriously, the Rapha Racing NYC cats were out and all wearing them and the jealousy swelled up inside me. Like I had not felt before towards the pink one. Well, the jacket that is. Then it went away because the sun came out, but I am sure that it will be back.

Mr. Spriggs (the Fabs Shirt is DOPE) was there (in the Grey Stowaway) and Sam was there Hott, Hott Hotting it up on his Igleheart Conti bike. I drank some of Sam's Kelso Beer throughout the week, and in fact I have taken to asking for it. They do not have it every where, but they should know that they need to be supporting my friends if they do not have it.

We also rode the the Rapha Condor Sharp guys when we were there. One of these people is Kristian House. He rode his face off at Battenkill, crashed, and then rode some more. But before that happened, we rode through Central Park. I rode up next to him and said, "I'm going to take a picture of your ass now." His response was "Yeah, that's ok, people have been doing that all morning." Well, you know what, if my name was on the back of my shorts, I would roll around practically showing it to everyone. Someday.

Tom Southam was also there. He rode his bike too. If you have not seen the most recent Rouleur, you should check it out. He penned a nice essay about the Tour of Britain. Today, actually he told me the title of his book that he is writing. Dan and I mistook it for a sex shop that we thought he was opening, it is amazing what a colloquial difference can make. If you say something to me, and I do not respond for something like 10-20 seconds, I am processing. It is not your fault or mine, just something that is happening.

One of the best though? Dan Sharp. I know, you have heard it before. But he is absolutely KILLING it out here. I get a little camera shy even. Not me personally, my cameras. They do not feel as big enough, or cool enough around his Twin Murdered Out Cannon Mark 5D's. Twin meaning two, murdered out meaning black. Think about it.

And that is how it goes.

Next stop? Boston and then we do it again.

218: Battenkill, a Birds Eye View.

2010-04-19T15:58:00.000-07:00

"Are you in a fucking helicopter?" I laughed when I read this text the other day. My worries that my tweets were not going through at this height were instantly dispelled.

How do I get myself into these situations? Well, I demand no less than a helicopter (Embro1) wherever I go, but this time around I had to settle for a L4 Piper airplane, otherwise known as the "Grasshopper." Kidding about the demanding thing, and if truth be told, for the sake of journalism I would think that truth is always told.

In any case, James and I were just about to take off to the start line when Dan Sharp aka Chris Milliman aka Dan Sharp (truth always told) came over to the car with a serious look on his face. "Anyone want to go up in an airplane?" he calmly stated as he leaned in the passenger side window. It was a serious look, but at the same time a little bemused at the situation. My gut reaction in situations like these, be it good or bad, is to say "yes, of course." For example, if Dan had come up to the car and said "We need someone to wrestle an alligator..." I will always be the first to raise my hand. It does not actually mean that I want to wrestle an alligator, it is probably just some knee jerk reaction to being left out of middle school sports, a deeply embedded reaction to being left out of the action.

So, when Dan gives me that stern look that he does, with one eyebrow raised that says "I think we are going to need someone to do this..." of course I say yes. I did not even think beyond the fact that this was something close to my civic duty to god and country. I would be going up in this plane.

From that point on everything happened with such a timed efficiency as to not sway my abrupt decision. Had there been just a moments worth of stall, just a minute of lag-time and surely I would have begged off. Quite possibly Mr. Sweeney knew this from the get go (was it possible that I was visually nervous?) because he kept up quite a banter about how he came to be in love with flying, how the plane worked and all that. He did a good job of keeping it up, because if I had time to get a word in edgewise I might have actually backed out. Especially after seeing the plane that I was about to get into.

We drove out to the airport. If that is what you would call this one-windsock little strip of grass on the edge of town, to see Mr. Rich Sweeney's L4 "Grasshopper." Not only was this machine completely restored by Mr. Sweeney himself but it did look to be in complete and working order, and was utterly spotless to boot. The working order on one of these quaint little birds of flight contains no real electronic hardware anyway, so I figured that we would be fine. (WTF?) And anyway, this guy Rich has been doing this for something like "a long time" which was his stock answer to my continual badgering. "Don't you worry about that," was another "you just worry about how to fly this thing if for some reason I can't once we are up there." Oh, ok, well, thanks for that.

I clambered aboard the plane and was seated in front. Which, looking back on it how was probably the best spot to be, because again, if I had to see with what simple knobs and pulleys that Rich was flying this plane, I might have backed out.

In a manner of seconds we were up off the ground and moving away from the airstrip. The whole valley opened beneath us. A spotted treeline became a huge maze of simple looking pinecones at that height. Cell phone towers became toothpicks and cars on the road simple ants moving slowly towards their desired destinations. Now all of this is not out of the ordinary in any aviation situation. A jetliner (do they still call them that) or your common passenger bus plane will give the same effect. But what is lost there, that certainly was not here, was the immediacy of everything. Not only did I have a simple door made out of chromoly tubing with some kind of wind fairing on it, but it was only latched shut by the top portion of the window. In other words the only thing separating me from the outside world was a thin sheet of sheet metal.

Maybe not something that I would recommend for everyone, but certainly quite an experience. To see more of the Aerial photos check out the Rapha Blog.

Hans Poot, Peter Rubijono, these are all for you. I was thinking about you the whole time. You would have loved it, and I am not going to lie, it also kept me from being scared out of my freaking mind. Whew. Thanks for that. And a big thanks to Mr. Sweeney, who's straight up passion for flying was the only reason that this happened.

217: Its a Love Hate Thing.

2010-04-16T19:08:00.000-07:00

My brain fucking hurts and I just ate a whole bag of licorice. Some days that is how things go. You know the ones, where everything seems to be going along so well, you are about to take a European Busman's Holiday. And Bam! Like an untimely Volcano erupting, your head explodes. However, I'm not going to let this just up and turn into one of "those days." Too easy, and I have my eye on you brain hurt. And besides, the world looks like it is about to come to an end anyway, what kind of problems could I really have?

Ok, I do have one. I can hear people having sex down the hall. And not the kind of sex that makes you sort of cock your head and listen a little longer than you should. Also not the kind of sex that would make you stop in the hallway of the hotel and tense up and listen. This sounds like grunting, sweaty, traveling salesman sex. Which I am guessing it is.

I love New York City, Oh yeah, New York City. Andrew W.K. could not have been more right. The town is easy to love and easy to get really annoyed with really quickly. That must be what happens when you jam that many people onto an island and hope for the best? You get the crazies along with the not so crazies.

Signature Cycles let me borrow an Ellium Race. Nice little bike there. And when I say little, I do mean little, it was smaller than what I am used to riding, but it gave me the chance to think about fit a little more than usual. Molly, Zac (CBS) and I discussed quite a bit of fit questions a couple weeks ago in Seattle and it was fun to think about them in the context of another bike. Or were we discussing the newest Bounce Society video? Can't remember.

And Paul Levine, from Signature is one of the guys who has pioneered, or at the very least, greatly helped advance the conversation of fit in the bicycle arena, so it is always good to hang around there, have a look and listen to what is going on. Grant showed me one of the most mind blowing commuter bicycles I have ever seen.

And these are all the reasons why I love visiting New York City. Even though I feel a bit more comfortable in a town like Boston, it is still a little tame when it comes to the drama. Maybe there is not a great enough mixture of things in Boston. Wheras in NYC it is not uncommon to talk to people about Bicycle Fit one minute and the next find yourself awoken in the middle of the night to the sound of a woman screaming bloody murder. And I am not talking about funny bloody murder, I am talking about someone by themselves screaming at the top of their lungs. A wild beast with no friends to impress. Only sadness and rage to expel. I covered myself with my blanket and tried not to think of a Medusa head floating outside the door to my room.

And then, juxtapose (not the magazine Lance) that with being up at 5:00 am to ride around town with a bunch of skinnier-than-thou professional cyclists from England and you might start to see what I am talking about. It was great to ride through Central Park (never done that before) and ride up next to James Nord along the way. I had seen his tumblr through Velogogo, which is one that I like very much. And then when you are riding along next to someone and look over and go No shit, that's the guy that geeks out on bikes via the interwebs like myself. We talked for a little bit about those same interwebs and also about just how fucking skinny the ankles of all the Rapha Condor Sharp guys really are. Like it makes you feel kind of pervy and weird to not only look at them, but comment on them as well, but still it was really funny..

Dan Sharp and I are officially on the road with this trip. You can see some of our adventures over on the Rapha Blog. And Damn if he doesn't Hot It Up with the Camera these days. We have been getting each other pumped and stoked and all that neat stuff that you do on the West Coast for weeks. But now that Mount Vesuvius Part 2: The Reckoning is taking place, that might not actually be the case. Our flight over to see Fleche Wallone has officially been canceled until further notice.

Maybe some other sort of trip is in the works if that will not work out? East Coast Bike Tour? I mean I was really hoping for the sunny shores of Belgium, so what would be second on that list? Seriously, ideas? I thought about saying, you know what, I'm going to wait, I'm going to wait a bit and then go to the tour or something to that effect, but then I realized, I do not want to see the Tour. But I do want to see Fleche Wallone and LBL. (ok, I do want to see the Tour as well...damn, it is such a hard line to walk - enthusiasm is)

PS - whomever sent over the below photo is awesome. I could not put the whole thing up because it is owned and shot by my hero Terry Richardson, but you can look at the whole thing HERE. And you should. Over and Over and Over again. The other Fabs. What a guy.

216: I Heart RBX

2010-04-11T23:13:00.000-07:00

Last Years Paris-Roubaix

I walked down the street today. My legs felt like someone hit them with a baseball bat. Not a really smashing blow or anything like that, just one good solid whack to each quad. Maybe with the added bonus of a punch to the middle of the calf - for good measure. However frightful this might sound though, it is not.

It happens mostly when you start out walking. Each and every curb that you step up, or down, feels like one of those awkward super high, or super low curbs. The ones that you feel like you should sort of jump off of, but feel ridiculous doing. Except that they are not those curbs. They are just regular curbs. Maybe it has something to do with the motion of riding? As soon as you swing your leg off the bike that fluid motion that has been a part of your body for the past few hours now becomes a series of broken and jerky movements.

The one thing that it does well is that it slows you down. Or in this case it slows me down. Yeah, yeah, stop and smell the flowers or something to that effect. However I always see or hear something that I never expect. For example, on the way down the street today: I heard the window slide open before I heard the women speak, before I saw her leaning out the window. She was very large and very black, but the words that came out of her mouth left me chuckling to myself for another two blocks. "Romeo! Rooo - Meee - Ohhhh! God damn it, where is shit is that boy when I need him." Eat it Shakespeare.

King Kong.

We rode the King Kong RBX this weekend. That is to say the Paris-Roubaix version of the King Kong Classic. This ride could, or might have been appropriated from its original intent. I would like to think not, but the possibility always exists. Hopefully we can keep it up as a sort of monthly ride (I really just like it as an excuse to try and design another funny flier). Although the very nature of the ride makes it worth getting together.

See the photo below? Does that not look like Roubaix? Ok, so maybe it does not, but the ditch looks a little like it... see the comparison? Well, Chris Milliman sent over some photos for me again. Love that guy. I have seen him in action a few times (Rapha, Ibex, Serrotta, Various and Sundry Cycling Events) but this one, where all he did was shoot photos of handsome looking Italian men. Well, that was pretty awesome to see...

Ditch - King Kong Classic 2010 Edition

Ditch - Paris-Roubaix, 2009 Edition

About to be Ditched - Paris-Roubaix, 2010 Edition

Photo by Chris Milliman

I rode this morning before I got to see the actual coverage from the race. Apparently the Verzus does not want you to watch their coverage either. Wow, never is it more apparent that they are not cyclists, or care about cycling, than when they cut to ads in the middle of THE decisive move of the day (week? year?), and then come back to the race after it has already happened. Yeah, I get it (you told me on twitter) you did cover the move. But eff that, I want to see what happened right up until the moment that the move was made.

No big deal, we can find it on the internet. Besides, the race happened hours ago, so don't you guys think that you could go back and make sure that we get to see the important moves? I just do not like to see people worry about these things. I want all the angles covered, so to speak.

Worry Not Weaver, You Do Indeed have the best Kit - King Kong Classic, 2010 Edition

Don't worry Dusty Chimp, you'll get it next year- Paris-Roubaix, 2009 Edition

You Just Finished and that is Fucking Amazing - Paris-Roubaix, 2010 Edition
(but the cobbles look to have jostled the Bell logo on your helmet)

Photo by Chris Milliman

The one thing that I was bummed to have missed (its Tax time what would you have me do?) is to have played Cyclocosm's game Paris-Roubino. Both BKW and B.Strickland sent over quotes for me to put together into a document. Maybe I will get to that in the next day or so (Better late than never??) but there were some really great ones on Cyclocosm as well. Wonder who won? Probably not Hincapie.

I am purposefully glossing over a few things that happened around the world this past weekend and I'm hoping for more answers as we move into the next few days. One of my favorite cyclists and member of the Embrocation Road Race team Colin Holmes Murphy went down hard at the Battenkill (a few broken ribs and a partially collapsed lung? fucking OW!)...think good thoughts think good thoughts...we are here for you my man.

215: On Battenkill, PR and other such things.

2010-04-09T00:52:00.000-07:00

It amazes me how much people geek out about the Classics, the Monuments, these early season races that somehow do not compare to anything else all year. It is No Joke. I do it too.

It is like the Super Bowl every weekend. No big deal. But speaking of the super bowl, good luck to everyone at Battenkill. Seriously. Harness your power animal, or whatever it takes and just effing go for it (power animal suggestions - Pink Hawk, Dolphin, Cougar, Honey Badger, Mountain Goat, Bunny Rabbit, and Marshmallow Peep).

There is also another big one this weekend in terms of the UCI world of cycling*. Who is it going to be? Can Cancellara do it again? You want to say probably not, if we are just basing things on odds. But there is more magic and mystery to these things than even I understand. What happens if these two babyfaced teens have to battle it out once again?

1. Pippo 2. Cancellara 3. Boonen (just a guess).

Found that via a pretty concise little write up about our man Cancel via Pez. It is worth a perusal if only for the photos of the man in Mapei kit (but the write up is a great overview of his already amazing career). Although I would venture that pretty much anyone in Mapei kit is bad ass. I guess that is the way to combat a particularly hideous cycling kit. Make sure that everyone riding in it be unmistakably BAD ASS that way your strange looking kit supported by an adhesive company get the recognition they deserve and thereby making your obnoxious clothing associated with "the cool." Either way, it works.

But this was today.

Chris Milliman Photography

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Riding
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There is some fun riding planned for this weekend as well. Kings Valley tomorrow and then another one of these King Kong Classic thingamajobies. Hopefully the weather either holds or is really shit. Could be either. Could be fun either way.

Also got a sweet snapshot of Joe out riding his fully built, fully awesome Ridley Helium at PIR earlier this week. Thought you might like this one. I am hoping that there will be some photos coming in from Battenkill because last I heard this morning there are something like 8 Embrocation riders in the CAT2 Field. Shite.

Also, check out the finishing tape that we have been working on. Now everyone can "finish off" their handlebars with a little bit of "embrocation" if you know what I mean. Wait, what?

Secret Tip #23: Follow Bill Strickland on Twitter for some up to date Roubaix coverage. I know that last year he talked about doing a live twitter feed through the entirety of the race. And if I know him he is going to have the best seat in the house (in a Press Car with the best driver in the World James Startt) That is all...

214: Hot Damn!

2010-04-05T22:34:00.000-07:00

I am sure you have seen this video already, but what about the one above? I never wake up in the middle of the night thinking that I am the first one to have found a video on the internet. However, I had a completely different sentence queued up for a completely separate video and then I found the Merkin one. Pangs of jealousy sweep over me when I watch these guys shred. But the best part is, that I found the above video as I was writing this and it made me forget about the jealousy and just be happy. And then it made me happier when I saw the Embrocation Tshirt in there. Hot damn! It was like Christmas happy (not mine, yours, I make sure that my Christmas' are painfully unhappy as to balance out the world for you.)

I knew I should have ridden more dirt drop in high school instead of the local root strew cow paths that Southwestern Wisco had to offer. Dammit!

Ok, here is a another video and then we're moving on...

Carey SH pointed this one out to me when I was doing a write up on the Gucci-like SRAM Force (what would Red be? D&G?) that we are putting on our Conti bikes. The short little piece shot and edited by Dave Christenson is pretty amazing, but then again, for those of you who know Chad, well, he's pretty amazing.

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What Else?
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What's New BQ had another interesting one today with his post "Surrogate Belgium." I like it when he says "Sneer as they may, I know I could drop every last one of those fuckers (who doesn't have the same thought?)" Are you with me Surrogate Cyclists? We can do this! Overthrow these....these... fuckers....these who call themselves the modern day bastions of cycling. (insert giggle — you were giggling when you wrote that right BQ?)

Now, I can take a practical joke just like the rest of you, and I certainly have the loveliest of lovely relationships with our voluptuous (purposeful insertion) vixen Hyperbole, so if the joke is on me, well then so be it. But really? Every last one of those fuckers? (Wait, am I one of those "Fuckers"??) Now, I have ridden many a times with my good pal Ben Lieberson (who, coincidentally is all over the new catalog) and I would bet nearly anything that you, BQ, would not be able to drop my pal Ben*.

You know why? Because he has nothing to lose for one. And two he really, really, really likes riding his bikes. And last because he's the fastest "fucker" on a bike that I have ever met. Ok, well, I met Lance Armstrong once, but still, you get my hyperbolic reaction here right?

God, this almost feels like one of those old timey Duel things. If only I had a Leather Town Glove within reach I would strike you across the face, bite my thumb at you, and then politely advise you to attend our next Gentleman's Race. Sigh. But I know you would never show.

Or would you?

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What Else? Part Two: More Real Humor Please
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Did I mention that my favorite cycling blog as of late is Cycling Inquisition? Holy Shite this guy is pretty much spot on when it comes to his cycling humor. Please, is it too good to be true? Or is it too true to never stop being awesome? And regarding this statement "As a trailblazing blogger, trendsetting cyclist, and above average Pictionary player I know the realities of being ahead of the curve." Mr. Inquisition you had me at "Trailblazing."

*or Steve, Dan, Piers, PVB, Peter, Sam, Ryan, Bravo and the rest of the Conti Crew (but I really do not know about that long haired guy in the rest of the photos, I think he's from Norway)

213: Clash of the Titans

2010-04-04T15:23:00.001-07:00

Photo by Chris Milliman

There really is not much to say when, seated I might add, Mr. Cancellara straight up CANCELS all the odds that Tom B. is going to win at today's Ronde van Vlaanderen. I keep hearing "Seated Till April, Seated Till April" while watching that move over and over. Even though it was not so much of a move as it was as that Cancellara was seeing different lines than Boonen.

If this is any indication of that, well, Cancel is going to crush a few more hopes this spring.

That familiarly disheartening sheepish look that some of the cyclists took on as they dismounted their bicycles (Devolder's was particularly heartbreaking) left me in amazement over what happens lest you miss that winning break. This will be an all to familiar sight to those riders next weekend at Battenkill that do not make it over the top of that dirt climb in the front. I am in no way bragging and was thankful to make it there last year after missing it on the previous two attempts. Godspeed to the throngs that will partake.

Looking back through this time last year brings up more than a few memories of the bleak landscape (not Battenkill, Belgium). The bars, all smelling the same with cigarettes, spilled beer, and possibly the scent of windburned skin, if there is such a thing.

Belgium — Part Two: Entry One
April 3, 2009

In any case I missed that God forsaken land so much I thought I should go back. D. Sharp and I just bought our tickets to check out the Fléche Wallone, and LBL. Sure, sure we are going to miss next weekends Monument Roubaix, but this way it ensures that we get to see two new ones in quick succession.

This will be the one (similar to last year) in which we explore the country that has produced some of the best cyclists ever to have lived. You could go straight to the top of that list (Merckx) or just jump around however you like (the immortalized Vandenbroucke, or the DeVlamaenek's, as well their contemporaries Boonen, Devolder). I was reminded of this train stop when reading Bill's new book. He takes a page (just one, and he does it so well) to describe the effect of Merckx on the cycling world this is near the end of the page by the way, after the description linking the Grand Tours to the Super Bowl and World Series.

"In his peak years he was victorious in one-third of all the races he entered, an unheard-of and still unmatched ration in a sport in which four of five wins a year make a rider one of the best there is. It's no stretch to argue that this cyclist ruled his sport in a way Michael Jordan and Roger Federer combined don't equal. For all of this, Eddy Merckx had a subway stop named after him." (Pg 14 — Tour de Lance )

All just background for the conversation on Lance though. You know, the one that you had today with your buddies while you were punching each other in the arm and rooting for Cancellara and Tornado Tom at the same time. Shouting out "no! Yessss!" and not really caring because either of those two winning makes you happy. Although, it helps with the 'putting him into context' part, if you will.

I guess it works because no one can mention anything about Professional Cycling these days without muttering Lance Armstrong under their breath. The tough thing is not knowing. Not knowing why you are muttering his name, not knowing why you hate him, or love him, only knowing that apparently both of these emotions can exist at the same time. Hence, the mutter.

Photo by Chris Milliman

Well, Milliman also captured one of Lance today. And whatever you do, Lance, to maintain that hawkish look of determination, well, you just keep on doing that one as long as you can. Only, at some point you are going to have to lose the bib-extensions, because they just look ridiculous and out of place in contrast to the graceful-yet-forceful pushiness of the Belgian landscape. You might be able to get away with that in the Tour, but not here.

Although at the same time it is comforting to be reminded that he gets covered in the same shit and grime that the rest of them do. Or, rather, that he is getting covered in that shit this year, for a change. What tactic is this Mr. Armstrong? What secrets do you hold in store for us as the year progresses (see, there I go talking about him again.)

"We pass Menchov, who's been dropped. Bruyneel looks out at him and says, "Menchov." A pause. "That's Menchov there." There's Both awe and regret in his voice, as if we're driving by a dying lion our safari party shot. Saxo goes to the front and jumps the pace, and the gap to the break comes down to about 3 minutes. Up ahead , the break is splintering under its own attacks." (Pg — 251 Tour de Lance)

Not really sure what the above quote has to do with the events that unfolded today although reading it out loud to Kyle and Molly seemed like the right thing to do this evening. And when you say something out loud it sounded a little more right than when I just typed the words. Menchov was not there but the the dying lion surely was. No matter who you decide to give that moniker to. This thought, that not only was the dying lion part of the mis-en-scene but was also somehow caused by the whole heaving throng that was cannot be escaped.

It is going to be a good year, or at the very least, interesting.

212: Ride Studio Cafe.

2010-04-01T00:41:00.001-07:00

Has anyone been in to see this Ride Studio Cafe? What can you tell me about this place? I saw some "leaked" photos from their opening this past weekend. Marty - I know you were there, (and this is where I pull you aside) How was it? Seriously, this is the concept that we have all talked about, the perfect combination of nice bikes and...say it... coffee. I know that there is one such cafe somewhere in Florida, but have never been there.

Alex Whitmore of Taza Chocolate told me about it a couple years ago. But, then my mother met the owners mother in Arkansas some where. That is where the story gets a little muddled, as I cannot remember the name, and we should not dwell too much on these details. Juan Pelota, that is another one of these such things.

I have been to that one and I will tell it to you straight. The combination of shopping and coffee is deadly to say the least. How apt was I to sit down and peruse every pair of Sidi's that were in stock merely because the coffee was hot and fresh and good? Very. Cannot wait to go back to Austin and cannot wait to check out The Ride Cafe.

Which, if you are not up to your neck in runoff you should head over and check out tomorrow night. Seven is donating a whole frigging bike. Which is pretty awesome. I did get to see Mo's bike earlier this year when she was out here for Nationals. I saw it a few times, but the only time that I got to sit down with it was actually the day of the race. You can find that here if you are interested.

There will also be some Embrocation action in the midst. Mo's part time husband and full time mechanic, (or is it the other way around?) Matt Roy wrote a nice little essay for Embrocation Volume5 this time around. "The MM Racing Service Course is an ever changing fusion of ideas, observations and tricks that I've picked up along the way." How can you argue with that logic?

And speaking of bicycles. Steve Francisco send over a few photos of his Ridley all built. Shit, that is a good looking bike, but you know what would make that bike look really good? Well besides Steve that is? Embrocation Decals.

You know, give it a few bits of Flare, not that it needs it. But the Lion of Flanders seems pretty fitting (for when Kim Kirchen wins this weekend that is.) My money is on either Cancellara or Kirchen. The Big One because I think that for some reason the Swiss rider just wants to win this race, and that is enough for me. And that little chain episode from last year better not happen again...because then he will be really pissed. And Kirchen? Just because I want him to win....that is all.

In Other News:
Not to worry if you cannot make it out to tomorrow night. I cannot because I do not live anywhere near the BoLex (that's Boston/Lexington) area. Though fear not, because if you can't make it, there are other options. One of those options would be to stay in and watch a movie. Oh, what is that? You want a suggestion?

I think that Birdedemic should do the trick for you. The whole catalog at Severin Films is at least worth a perusal.

211: Man's Last Stand, Again.

2010-03-30T21:18:00.001-07:00

You all have seen Joe Staples before right? So, when I mention that he is a part of the team, or talk about how great he is you are not going to be surprised correct? When it comes to Embro West (you have to cross your two middle fingers in the middle when you make the W) Abby, Ryan and Dan are pretty fucking fan-tas-tic, but we need to do these by baby steps for a couple of reasons.

1. Because he is not featured on the Team section of the website (which his lovely wife publicly shamed me for) but then again no one on the Embro West side of things is up there. Which I would think should maybe be taken into account"? And why is that you might ask yourself? Well, that is because - collectively (on the West Coast) we like to "run and gun" as they say. Fly a little "under the radar" if you will.

2. If I were to start to opine on just how awesome all these Cats are, well, then you, dear reader would be here for daaays. Because they are that awesome. But we'll get to that, fear not. There is time for everything.

But I figure, I can talk, and you guys know what I'm talking about. Just let me know if you need filling in, because I can do that as well.

But the reason that Joe is at the forefront of my mind is also two fold. The first because new team bikes have been trickling in. And by trickling I mean that they are here. And two because I saw his (and his lovely wife's) handiwork on the big screen last night. And it kind of blew my mind.

I did not dare take Joe's Helium out of its neatly bound package mainly because I felt it rude to fondle another mans frame that way. But also because the seatmast protruded in this way that made me blush a little bit and just felt wrong to delve into. But I did manage to take a few snaps before he came to whisk it away.

Chances are, if I were a betting man, I would say that an Embrocation Decal set would follow closely behind something like this. "Team it up a bit." Just saying.

Alright, so you saw his bike. Now see this. Or, maybe you actually you have seen it already? This played during the most recent Superbowl. But actually, it is a big deal, because a lot of people watch that game. And to be "in the know" you have to at the very least know that it exists.

And if you were to quiz me on Superbowl knowledge I would more than likely defer to big names such as Brett Favre or Tom Brady (the only two quarterbacks I have known in my adult life - and I by known I mean "aware of.") Them and maybe Joe Montana. But I would not have actually known much about the Superbowl. Which brings us up to date and at the movie theater last night...

Hot Tub Time Machine. (see it, see it, see it, seriously fucking see it, it's hilarious)

So, Kyle, Molly and I are sitting in the movie theater last night (see above) and Man's Last Stand (see below) comes on. Kyle and I decided we like the last guy the best. He is definitely the weirdest. But in this theater. The one where we are about to watch Hot Tub Time Machine (we'll get to that later), this is the largest theater I have been in recently. Maybe ever. And this is what we see, but picture it on the hugest screen ever...

Well, Joe wrote that. He and Jimm pulled the whole thing off with his wife Jessica and Mark Romaneck. Yeah. Same one. Remember when you saw the Weezer El Scorcho? Yes, same Romaneck. He has one of those Director Series guys. No big deal if it was the second version. All that matters is that he's awesome. And the movie One Hour Photo has Robin Williams in it, who was also in Ferngully. See, brought it back around.

But the point of all this is... at the end of the ad, the car drives straight at the camera and then, in a feat that could only be pulled off in a theater of this magnitude, drives straight over the crowd. "Damn, check that out, how do they do that?" is what was uttered, I don't know by whom. "Well, they smash the shit out of a really expensive camera" was my reply. "I know this because I have seen it."

You be the judge. And then, the next time that you see this trick used in movies or tv shows, know that this is what it takes to get this shot. It is not just another small camera with a wide angle lens. This is the real deal. Smashing shit. Kicking ass and taking names later. Right?

210: This Weekend Past

2010-03-29T00:44:00.001-07:00

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Riding
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A woman at Heart Roasters the other morning told Joe that of all the cycling clothing in that room (and there was more than a bit) the one with the coffee on it was the best. Which is always nice to hear. Because Coffee is the best. If you are looking to get some of your own, it looks as though the only ones left are the long sleeve jerseys and the leg warmers...

Word on the street is that we are in for another two weeks of rain. This past week/weekend was pretty awesome for riding and ride we did. I think that this is the most amount of riding that I have ever done in the month of March. We rode a couple times with Cindy, not only is she one of the cyclists featured in the new Rapha Women's Line, but she's also a pretty badass rider. And I say "badass rider" because she also rides motorcycles (with photographers on the back, and through Europe) and possibly a Rally Car or two.

Then there was J. Curtes (check out his photos from the Snowboarding world) out and about with his Speedvagen. Have not seen it since the gentleman's race and yes, I think that maybe I did miss the Gold Foil Decals on his hoops. There was some comment on whether or not these 68's were road appropriate. Maybe because they were so loud that everyone got jealous and started looking for a way to get them out of there. Carbon clinchers. Just saying.

Dan Sharp and I both almost fell off our bikes trying to get the closest look possible of the EDGE decals. They look really smart with the whole setup of the Vagen. And when jealousy calls she calls loud and hard. Damn Sirens. It is the time of year for new gear. There will be no denying that. When the sun peaks out just a little bit then the new booties (guilty) socks, kneewarmers appear as if it was christmas morning. How much of a social boner would it be to not be rocking new gear each spring? Sheesh.

Ever notice that there is a certain gait that cyclists adapt off the bike? The appearance is one of a sort of ambulation that one might associate with a cowboy or at the very least a motorcycle tourist. Someone who has been seated most of their life. It looks almost painful but at the same time instantly conveys (to those of us in the know, wink and a nod) that this individual spends more time pedaling a bicycle than actually walking.

I might have stolen that last paragraph out of Bill Strickland's book on big L's comeback. His descriptions of cyclists are so spot on in that they make you look at other riders, at yourself, to attempt to decipher this code that is cycling. Pretty soon I will be ambling along the side streets of Portland attempting to look more 'cowboy.'

Which I would guess in this town might help me to fit in?

------------------------------------------
Sneak Attack with Ira Ryan.
------------------------------------------

-----------------------------------------------
After Black Hammer (more later)
-----------------------------------------------

There was other sorts of riding that happened this weekend as well. Jam packed was this one. The second one you can easily reproduce in the comfort of your home or backyard. It is really easy to do. Or at least the version that I came away with.

Steps:

1. Wrap a dark colored bandanna around your eyes insuring that you cannot see for shit.

2. Run/Ride as fast as you can towards the nearest undergrowth or brush. You will fall.

3. This is where you would think "repeat" would be in order. But it is not. When you crash, which you inevitably will do. Just keep down real low to the ground. And while you are down there, bang your head on the ground a few times, and then just for kicks get your friends to run over you with their bikes. It will be great I promise.

In all honesty. The After Black Hammer went off without a hitch once again. And when the x-rays come back and we hear that nothing has been broken, then we will know the truth. But until then I will leave you with a motorcycle from the shop of James Crowe. Who Shreds. More on that later.

209: A Few Things on Friday.

2010-03-26T00:48:00.000-07:00

Fat Marc, you are amazing. I like it when people have good things to say in the comments section. Other than that, not really too much of an idea as to what goes on in the minds of readers. If you are out there.

But yes, there was some pretty sweet times happening in the MAC races. 2008 USGP in Trenton New Jersey was pretty awesome. I had about 10 more psi that was necessary for the slipperiest muddiest course known to man. And instead of doing the proper thing that I knew I needed to do, which was pull over and let air out of my tire. I just kept plodding along trying to make up for it on the long straight stretches. And you were right (it was Pete Rubi) but he did say, matter of factly, "guys, this is not working." At least we had the wherewithall to laugh about it. A lot.

Ok, what else? Couple of sweet little nuggets of truth out there for you.

A Few Things...

1) Where can I get a custom toothbrush made? I wish I was joking, but I am not. I liked the Retrotech one very much. But I saw this one yesterday, and I am really liking it. Plus the flyer promoting it is even more awesome. Draplin Design Company is based here in Portland, OR. And they do some pretty cool stuff, take a look (nay, get lost) in the site. Also, do all of the worlds greatest Cobra Dogs branding and design. Get a shirt.

2) Speedvagen/Rapha/Hemi
There has been a new partnership abreast. That between Rapha, Speedvagen and Hemi. It looks a little something like the below photo. Basically it means going really fast and looking really sweet when you are doing it. I cannot, will not take credit for this one either. This one was brought to you today by Mr. Joe Staples. And if you are wondering who that character might be? Well, someone emailed me today and asked where they could learn more about applying Embrocation. Look no futher my friend.

In all seriousness though you should take a moment to peruse through the newly formed Speedbloggen. Sacha and company are churning out the hits at the moment and most specifically there has been a lot of buzz and speculation surrounding the Rapha/Speedvagen Cyclocross Team. Sacha addresses some of that here, but so far all we have is some really sweet looking kits and bikes. And trust me when I say that if I knew more, you would be the first to know...

3) Good Habits Clean Living - the second printing of the Major Taylor pamphlet by Chris Piasick is pretty damn sick looking. I kind of dig these two blues together. Maybe it is because I have so man fond memories of racing against a dominating cycling team with the same colors, but maybe it is just becuase I love these colors together. I also like that he is using Repeat Press to make stuf for him. I was fortunat enough to get in and see that place. Very cool and some very old letterpress machinery that is a little mindblowing.

4) Vans Supercorsa Italia Edition.
Well, I guess I need to get some new Vans. I mean, I wear them all the time anyway. They help me do sweet tricks on my longboard. Not really, but I do think that they are pretty awesome and Spring is almost here. I found this through Trackosaurus, again. Cause he's dope. Also digging the fact that they attempt to pay tribute to the jerseys of the Giro. White - Youngest, Green - KOM, Pink - Leader, Cyan - Sprints, and Black - for the last place finisher. All signs point them being availible in July (two months after the Giro.)

Ok, that is all.

208: Straight Outa Nottingham.

2010-03-24T23:59:00.000-07:00

You have heard me talk about this bike. Well here it is. In all its single-speed glory. Thanks to everyone who wrote in requesting the bicycle. Both of you. You did the right thing and went with your heart and I appreciate that. Sincerely. And I have not forgotten about you. Really.

And maybe you find it rude, that I post these photos after the fact? But, I guess that is just the breaks. I had tons of great submissions (four total) and people really went all out (by writing emails). Just asking you to think outside the box a little is all. Take a chance. Take a chance on a dream? What am I even saying I do not know?

I did have a savior in all of this though. One man went out of his way to put a little creativity back out there in the world. I mean, the truth of the matter (this is the sunshine talking) that we do so much TAKING these days that maybe it was time to give back a little bit? So, this guy went and made a board game out of it. What the fuck? It works as well...

Kyle and I gave him the 20 questions about it and he responded like he knew what the hell he was talking about. I'll have to get back to you on the name (which means I'm going to make him change it to something with BRO in it.) The little moving figurines are a used chamois, a Mach3 razor, and a worn out set of road cleats all cast in copper. It is going to be that big. And if you happen to follow Kyle VonH on twatter: @newantarctica you might have seen some of the preliminary drawings that are definitely going into the final design of the board game.

God damn that is a hot saddle.

There is a little bit of mud there on the Pabst logo but I somehow thought that appropriate. This bike has been ridden sweetly and caressed through the mud a limited number of times. Each time was with great care and attention to the pain that was searing through my body at the time. Going straight from a legitimately (attempted) A Cross race to that was not what I would call a pleasant experience. But still Reigning Holeshot Champion Tony Pereira did ok with it.

I really like what these guys are doing though. Both the SSCXWC and Raleigh. I have seen a disconnect between brands and "scenes" happen before. We all have. And it isn't happening here. Whatever Sally's practices "off the court" may be, "on the court" he has his eye on the ball. Always. What I am still trying to figure out though... is why, when I had that red and black Raleigh CX bike in 2004 or 05 (you know, the one with the carbon rear triangle, I'm sure I have photos somewhere)

My how the times have changed huh? The ones of myself from that era are pretty funny as well. Richard Fries took to calling me "the bearded gent" for a while. Could not tell if that was a gentle urging to shave or something else entirely. It was also around this time that we started making trips down to the MACC series and Fat Marc and I instantly became frenemies. I wish I could remember how the start of that friendship went? A mid-race conversation? A passing thought as we brushed shoulders on the course?

Me: You're wearing a pink helmet.
Marc: Yup.
race race race pedal pedal pedal turn race pedal pedal pedal
Me: You always wear that helmet?
Marc: Pretty much.
race race race pedal pedal pedal turn race pedal pedal pedal

Seriously though I don't think that is how it went down, and I want to remember. Damn it. I think that it had something to do with me coming down and stealing precious points away from his boy in the B's. There might have been some hostility even at one point. (a very- who do these guys think they are kind of thing) but I'm betting that it was Marc who tempered everything with a joke. I also remember that after a couple years our relationship (yeah I took it there) progressed to a point where if I got to the start line and could not find him I would just let fly with a "MAAAARC" which in turn would be answered "DUUUUUNNNN." Primitive I know, but also effective.

So, enough for the trip down memory lane...

My real question was this...

Why did my Raleigh Cross Bike (the Red and Black one) have 135mm spacing in the rear? It was the only one out of the whole batch that had it. Ideas? Was it only so that I could use my Spinergy Wheels with the frame? Thought so.

207: King Kong Classic2

2010-03-21T19:05:00.000-07:00

KV reminded me of this today. So good. 2006 Tour de Suisse

Remember when I said that Tom Boonen was going to win Milan San Remo? Well, I was right and finally CD and I can agree on something. At the party last night he came up to me and said...

CD:
"Do you know who won today?"

Me:
"Yes, of course. Tom Boonen."

CD:
"You are correct because Oscar Freire was being helped by the Right Hand of God."
Fact.

And I do not remember who was standing with us when all of this happened, but I am sure that they were mystified beyond reason. This MSR outcome makes me even happier than if Boonen would have won. Oh, I do love our Booger Sugar touting Belgian friend. (That's streetcode for Cocaine.) But Freire? When he is anywhere near the front in the last few K's he reaches into his jersey pocket and pulls out sheer magic. The three time WC is a crafty-crafty man who knows where to be and when to be there. Besides, who would not want a leadout from the Liquigas team?

King-Kong Classic

Number two went off without a hitch. Especially with Daniel Lloyd, the Cervelo Test Team rider pictured in the KKC2 flier being alerted to his participation in at least the photo portion of the ride. This photo was from last years Gent-Wevelgem. Straight up and over the town of Gent, and we were standing at the top of the hill as Daniel and Co. flew past.

The real best part though? MsR was the talk of the town as we rolled out on the now monthly King Kong Classic ride/race/friendly slugfest. Is it monthly now?

Also Dave G. from River City Bicycles was on the ride. And he was all talk about the MSR race as well, I snapped this photo just as I heard him telling Matt Kare that he was actually present in 2002 when Cippolini won. I find that to be pretty damn awesome. Plus, his use of the full on fendered steel bike was a pretty awesome sight to behold.

Abby and I were speculating on whether or not the previous days good weather had anything to do with every ones good moods. People were calling to us from their Porchside viewing spots and we cruised up Thompson and into the hills. She made the great observation that there was reportedly great weather all over the country. "I hope that everyone goes into this Health care Reform vote as happy as we are. And I guess they were.

The weather looked as though it was going to hold off for at least the first bit, but by the time we made it to the top of Thomson it was already starting to come down. And no one wants to stand around in the rain. So, off we went. Things got a little tense when we hit the gravel sector, we will call it Gravel Sector 1, or GS1, if you will. At GS1 is where things really started to heat up and I watched Weaver pedal through a full on two wheel Tokyo Drift through the first right hander. It was awesome.

There were a few things that happened after that but most of them involved heavy breathing, at least on my end, and me staring cross eyed at the wheel in front of me. Especially when that wheel in front of me belongs to a couple of people. 1. Molly testing out her new Ridley Helium. And 2. New father Shannon Skerritt on his fully fender-ed ultra commuter. The bottles were a dead giveaway though.

I flatted out of the first version of this ride/race and did not get to see the entirety of the climb. Well, today I found out what I was missing and it involved a little bit of and incline. Some grunting, and then more of an incline. This (photo below) is what kept me going for the entirety of the ride. While I could not hide in the vast shadow/wind block that is the Weaver (that is not meant as an offense either.) I did have the image burned into my retinas for the majority of the ride.

Weaver got this when he was over for the Cyclocross worlds a couple months ago. And I have to check with a few anonymous sources but I do believe that this is the same character that raced in the full Budweiser kit in the Luxembourg Cross Race last year. I remember this clearly mainly because the only other Americans that I knew there were Yash and his girlfriend (now fiance Megan). But someone else in the crowd, and I couldn't tell where it was coming from - just kept yelling "Goooooo Budman!! YEAHHH BUDMAN."

It made me feel gross and unamerican.

But now I am over it.

Also, we had a little bit of a party over at Ampersand the other night. Great stuff came of that and thank you to everyone who came out to help celebrate and make Volume 5 possible. Take for example this little guy. To end on a cute note is always good. Especially when it involves a super great Spider-Man hoodie...

206: More More More.

2010-03-19T00:44:00.000-07:00

Evil Ryan keeps asking about Ping-Pong this weekend, and the only thing that I could think was. Ping-Pong Porno Paddles. Not because I am really that into...(which am I going to say?) Porno, but because this would be a sweet thing to have on hand. Plus David Neevel made them and that makes them awesomer...why? Because he has a beard and I just saw a photo of him holding cookies at a bar downtown. Beards and cookies.

Also, there have been a little bit of sweet-age showing up at the office for the party this weekend. Mr. Sachs himself sent over a print which looks really good and was done by House Industries. I want you to have one.

And the Chris Piascik Major Taylor piece showed up. The little pamphlet style book looks really great. Take a look through his site as there are some great hand drawn letters happening over there. Really good looking stuff. So, there is that. But in all honesty, I really really like this one not only for the historical reference, but also for its overall message. It sounds like M. Taylor is the kind of guy that I would not mind hanging out with. "Don't Forget to Play the Game Fair." How do you even argue with that?

Also heard that he is going to be printing a full on letterpress style one. So, that should be good too.

There will be some T-Shirts on hand as well. I did a little T-shirt section in the new publication and have been getting some good feedback on it. Actually I just made that I up, I haven't gotten much feedback on it, but in an effort to "Play the Game Fair" I just thought that I should let you know where I am coming from. The guy working the hotel desk at the NAHBS said that he really liked this section though because I had sweet "tats". Thanks man, but I have realized (maybe just tonight) that I kept getting tattoos to cover up the really bad ones. They are good now, but when it first got going... yikes...(what I was 17.)

I'm going to do a similar spread like this for amateur cycling kits the next time around, so let me know if you think that I should feature yours. Because, really, I probably should. And wait till you see how I am going to shoot it. (Ones I am hoping for - Wooly Mammoth, PBS, CBS, HUPIS LIBRIS, ATMO, Pony Shop, Ritte, Cambridge Bicycle, Geekhouse, IF... what am I forgetting? I know that I am forgetting a few there.) So, send me over an email if you think that your kit should be featured.

But here is what the TShirt looks like. If you are not going to be albe to make the party. You are in luck! You can still get one of your own on these shirts. Which I made by hand. Well, sort of. I printed out the logo and then placed some tracing paper over it. But, it seems to make a better story if you actually made it by hand.

Also, the fun is not going to stop this weekend. Or at the very least on Saturday. The Veloforma Gals are having their own little party right down the street and I highly recommend that you go and check this one out as well. I am planning on it. Dave Roth, our man in the field, said that he went to this event last year and every girl on the team was dressed up and looking positively great in what could almost pass as evening wear. That is a good reason to be there.

and then...

On Sunday morning when you wake up with a hangover from having too much beer. Then I guess you could come and ride this. I seriously just found this flyer on the way over here and scanned it into the computer. Fresh off the press or something... Anyway, I did the first one and it was so much fun that I think I will do it again.

PS - Boonen is definitely going to win Milan San Remo. Cavendish is out getting his teeth fixed and who else do we have? Hausler? Nope, injured. Maybe someone old and crusty?

Also, the same Dave Roth that was pushing me to break it up with the EMBRO awards harped on me so badly tonight for not following through with all of them that I think they will continue. I really thought that people were over the NAHBS and didn't care too much so I thought I would just save it all for the actual issue. But worry not, I'll finish it out.

See you Saturday.

205: Never Been to Spain (the song.)

2010-03-16T12:28:00.000-07:00

Ampersand
2916 Alberta Street PDX
3/20/2010
6-10pm

Mention free beer. Just mention it.

See? I told you that the Flyer out of Ampersand would be much better than mine. If for no other reason than they got the address correct. I got that word that there is going to be some Mad Alchemy action up in this piece as well. Yes, I said up in this piece. That was almost as "street" as when CD quoted Biggie Smalls this morning. Judas Priest I am used to, but Biggie plucks at the heartstrings.

Did I mention that I am excited to hang out with everyone this weekend, albeit nervous? Tina Brubaker twitted, or tweeted that she was coming and things were going to get "broke." And then on top of that 21st Avenue bicycles commented that they were going to "destroy everything in sight." Am I to take this as a sign that things may actually get broken at the Ampersand Shop? That is not what I had in mind.

I simply thought that we could get together and discuss some of the issues of the day?

Some of the issues of the day:

1) This amazing post on Craigslist. "Black turtle mud spikes = Pinhead designed and tested to raise hell" I don't even know what that means, but it makes me laugh.

2) Corey Haim. What happened little buddy? (Ok, we all know what happened.)

3) Speaking of Mind Melting. My mind melted when I saw this on Tracko today. You can find a few other ones on the site of Jorge Leon. Sir, you are now in the awesomebook just for putting this little collection together. Virenqe and Indurain are my favorites. Ok, I like Delgado too. Ok, they are all pretty awesome. I fucking love Virenque's haircut on this too. I'm doing that for the summer.

Every time I think about Indurain, or even hear the mention of his name I think about Spain. I was there a few years ago and somehow found myself humping this crappy mountain bike up throught hills that I could not fathom now if I tried. Everywhere you looked there was sunshine and goats. You would have to stop in the road and wait on the hot tarmac for them to move along. Then get a running start and jam on the broken pedals and hope for the best.

You know how they (people who have no clue about cycling) shout "Gooo Lance" whenever they see you in a cycling kit? (Shame on you if you wear yellow). Well, over there they chant something else and it goes "In-du-rain, In-duuu-rain." It only took me about seven goat herders to figure out what they were saying. And the instant it did my hear swelled to three times its normal size and tears squeezed from my eyes.

Thanks Spain.

4) The Spanish Mashburn
Speaking of Spain, my teammate Kyle Smith (I can still say teammate if he's on the East Coast right?) and former teammate Nick Mashburn (Cambridge Bicycle and now Svelte? Awesome!) are riding their right now. And I am insanely jealous. I guess I will go ride Otto Miller to punish those thoughts out of my silly little head tomorrow.

See you in a couple days. Or not. But before I go, I'll leave you with this little photo. It was a twitter post earlier today, but before that I printed it in Embrocation Volume one. And before that someone took it and then gave it to my other Hero Steve Pucci.

204: Spring is in the Air.

2010-03-15T19:59:00.000-07:00

Is it possible to get too excited that Classics Season (something other folks like to call Springtime) is finally upon us? What is it that makes me want to pour over old photos and video looking for answers? Can VDB pull it off? The above piece was written by the esteemed (and nominee for Delaware Cycling Hall of Fame) writer Fat Marc Vanderbacon. Yes, and yes please.

Thanks Radio Freddy for giving us this brief — hands draped over the bars — lesson in Style.

But who can we speak to as this years equivalent? A punchy, flashy replacement for our recently downed hero? The younger Schleck? He needs a little bit of class yet...has too much of that scrubbed clean feel to him? Do you know what I am talking about here, or am I making this up?

Does anyone really care you are asking yourself? R. Freddy cares. I care. Which is also why there may be a reciept for some white overshoes and matching gloves sitting right next to me. (no I did not audition to play mickey mouse at a talent show.) Ok, sorry about this little tangent, I can hash these things out for myself up Otto Miller this Wednesday (12:30).

I know what is on everyone's mind these days: How can I get Tony Periera's autograph? I have a few ideas, but the one that I keep coming back to is to head over to Ampersand this coming Saturday and ask him yourself. And I will tell you this much, lets hush our voices for a minute lest someone overhear us. Ira was signing them at the NAHBS. You be the judge on this one.

Speaking of which. There are a lot of Portland representatives that made it into Volume 5. Tori Bortman runs Gracies Wrench out of the Vanilla Workshop these days and wrote a lovely piece about the building of some Edge Tubular wheels. Wheels that you could use for cross, but that you could also use for the Road if you so desired. Super Sexy Dan Sharp photos as well.

I on the other hand am going to be the judge on this one (I know, already too much italics). What if I said that you needed to WRITE to get me to hand over this SSCXWC bike?
It has Ultegra Tubeless Wheels on it. Twitter says so.

So, Myles, Kyle and I have officially talked about it, so I think that we can move forward with this manner. Submissions are now officially open for a the piece that will WIN this bike. The bike featured in the SSCXWC piece mentioned yesterday. I know you have yet to actually see the bike, but let me tell you - its awesome.

Now the question becomes this...What Do I Submit? And I can go ahead and walk you through it if you like, but that would probably defeat the purpose. What I can do is go ahead and give you a few of the early nommination ideas. Think outside the box here people, this is for you.

1. Photo Submission
Molly Cameron went ahead and nominated her mechanic Jake to do a piece (with photos) about what it is like to be a mechanic for her. I like his forrest photos, the ones of his van, and of course the Cyclocross Ones.

2. Sheer Stoke
Both Kyle (who is another judge, mind you and my main ideas man here) and Cory said something to the effect of "I would shred your face off for this bike."But we were listening to heavy metal and drinking heavily, so I am not entirely sure if that is how it actually went down.

3. Written Submission
Maybe you want to sit down and pen a memoir about how Cyclocross has changed your life? That is cool. I would be totally into that. As long as you can do it in less words than you think Hemmingway could, and get punched in the face twice while working on it. Then do that one. But, in all honesty. I do love me some written words.

4. Self Submission (easy tiger)
Molly nomminated herself as well. Not really sure how that is going to work out, but she said it would "be all about her." I guess the point here is if you can come to me and say "this is me, and this is why you should do a story about me AND give me an effing bike AND I am convinced by this (no physical violence please.) Then we will go with this one.

5. Visual Submission
Are you into the design arts? Maybe a Printmaker or Letterpress Agent (don't think that they are actually called that) and you think you have what it takes to help out with doing the Interstitials (Reflections, Distractions, Features) of the publication. That would be a pretty awesome barter.

So, there you go. A few ideas to get you moving. I am really open to anything at this point. The point of it is that I am hoping to print it in an upcoming volume of Embrocation Cycling Journal...so there is that as well.

203: Volume 5 Party - Celebration Funtimes.

2010-03-15T01:28:00.000-07:00

Ampersand Vintage

---- 2916 NE Alberta Street, Suite B----
Saturday, March 20th
6 to 10PM
Raffle and Prizes.

Also mention, free beer & wine.

Pretty excited about this one. There have been a ton of people from the Portland area (and elsewhere too - DE, IL, MA, CA) that helped to make this issue possible, so I thought it might be a good time to pay tribute to them. Or at least the ones in the immediate area by buying everyone beer. That is ok right?

Raffle and Prizes:
This should be a good one. There will be raffle tickets available to everyone who purchases a copy of Embrocation from the shop. As well as raffle tickets give out to anyone who purchases anything at Ampersand (as long as it is over the price of an Embrocation). And then raffle tickets given out to anyone that can otherwise convince me that you should get some raffle tickets. I will tell you a little more about the prizes this week but I know that one of them will be a bottle of my favorite Whiskey. Plus I am hoping that I can just roam around my neighborhood and come up with some other cool prizes (a live chicken?).

I do know that one of the prizes is going to be pretty badass. Badass in a badass kind of way. I got one of the SSCXWC bikes to test out for a bit this past Cross Season and I thought that you should have it. Plus, Shimano chipped in with some really great Ultegra and PRO parts to help kit it out. Kyle Vonhoetzendorff did the interview with Matt and Dani and he and I have come up with a foolproof way of determining a clear winner for this bicycle. More on that later, but I will tell you that Kyle and I are going to be the judges on this one so start the wheels turning on how to solicite our attentions/votes.

Mark your calendar. It is going to be good.

Matthew Karre (who works at River City Bicycles) wrote this piece about James Selman. Both of these guys live in town here, so hopefully we can get them to come out and sign autographs. I bet that Matt and James would be autograph signing whirlwinds. To say the least.

Ira Ryan and Tony Periera's shops are featured in a little section titled Workshop. Dan Sharp shot the photos and there are a few essays included in this one by not only Ira and Tony, but also The Mix chef and writer Matthew Card. He does some writing about food here and there. The last little one that we did together was the Pasta selection over this way. In this one however he talks about knives. Fancy knives.

In any case. Keep an eye out here for the remainder of the week. I will give you a closer look into that of Ampersand which will hopefully reinforce your desire to check it out. Or make you really, really jealous that you will be unable to attend this coming weekend...

Also, there is something going on just down the street if you get bored here (you won't) it will involve the Veloforma/Corsa Concepts racing squad and a whole bunch of Carbon. Bikes, blades, boards, I am not even sure where the carbon begins and ends these days... (which makes me excited.)

202: Time only Tells.

2010-03-12T00:01:00.000-08:00

So, I had to speed this up so that we could get through it. And while I was putting some music to it I realized that, not only did it sound funny in a chipmunks sort of way, but that Molly is talking some hilarious shit about everyone. In any case, it will give you a chance to check out the new issue. And it just sounds funny. The other thing that I like is the pertinent Boom content. Yeah, go go, cannonball run style, take it all...and then when you're not on top...get all sensitive about it. Obviously, we know what he is thinking. Classics. Boom, you're killing it, just keep it upright and somehow I think that you will be fine. (and keep taking twitpics when you hold every jersey in the race, that makes me think you really are a badass.)

Hung out with Dave Roth last night. And I put it to him, I said, "Rothie, what the fuck? Are people reading any of this? Are the NAHBS that interesting or am I playing it out too much." He just stared at me for a while and then he said this:

"I think that people want to hear what happened behind the scenes."

No, I know that he is asking me for gossip, but that got me to thinking. This is something that I say every year so much that I always think people are going to get sick of hearing it. The thing I love the most is when people get together and talk about their experiences in this industry — that they basically invented. I say that a little tongue in cheek, but seriously, the history behind all this is not so removed that it is long gone...

These are the moments from the show. When you remember people from the year before, or people open up and tell you a few little moments from their lives that brought them to the NAHBS. That is when things start to become fun.

-Carey threw up her fish and chips all over the restaurant. We were pretty non-plussed about the whole scenario. I mean it looked hilarious, but really, no harm no foul. There was not that many people in this back area. But the people next to us...well, they were mortified by the situation. And I guess rightfully so. But either way, it happened, so we just kind of dealt with it. Plus, Matt and Nate are two of the funniest people there, so it makes sense that people were literally laughing their food right out of their stomachs. Nate also recently wrote a pretty awesome account on the whole weekend: Nate on NAHBS

- and then Nate stuck the spoon in his nose. But, I think, if I am remembering correctly Mr. Curtis Inglis actually got some video of this strange occurrence. We shall see. He did however have a great booth. Whenever I heard people ask about it he said "its just string. I brought string along." Honesty is the best policy. But his bikes look pretty amazing as well. And he always (Handmade Not in Portland??) has the best t-shirts. I really like the saw, and you know it is a good shirt because I saw a lot of people wearing it around the show (the true test, passed.)

-Clint, Tall Erik and I walked around one night. We could not find anywhere to eat. The show had just let out and every bike geek for miles around had taken up residence in every open seat at every open restaurant for miles around. We followed four tall beautiful black women into the convention center. For some reason they just looked like they knew either a) where they were going, or b) something cool going on. When they turned the corner into the Magic: the Gathering Convention boy were they in for a surprise. They actually made faces and reacted in a way that made me think that they were physically repelled by what they happened upon in that moment.

-Then we played some darts with B. Strickland (the other B.) Tony Pereira beat my pants off. That is how that phrase goes right? Beat my pants off. It just sounds weird when it is you saying it instead of my uncle Tim. He is the manager of a grocery store and has a lot of catch phrases. ("You dropped your pocket," is one his favorites) Tony (I bet Tim is too) is good at darts though. Does not really surprise me though. He is probably one of these guys that is pretty good at whatever he does. Check out his photo of Joe Bell though. I promised I wouldn't put up photos of the guy but damn if he is not straight up amazing. Glad to have met you JB.

I am glad that there are people out there that want to keep this madness going.

201:NAHBS - EMBRO Awards - Part Two

2010-03-08T23:00:00.000-08:00

First a little follow up from the day before. Ok, I get it. They are Carbon Tubulars on Zanc's bike there. Sheesh you would think that I insulted the Pope claiming his brother was in a sex prostitution ring or something the way that people react sometimes. Nah, just kidding, it was not that bad. It is just that I sort of mentally put Edge Carbon Clinchers on Zanc's bike. It is what I did with every bike at the show. Except for the ones in Cole booth. Those I left untouched.

You know how some people try to imagine girls naked? Other people do that right? I try to imagine bikes with Carbon Clinchers on them. I try to imagine a world where everyone rides carbon clinchers, all the time, except during cross season. Sometimes it happens, and sometimes you're left with ratty old Dura Ace laced up to ages old Mavic GP-4's, but I guess that is my problem (hyperbole.)

Speaking of COLE wheels. Its time for the second, or first EMBRO Award.

EMBRO Award: Cyclocross Bicycle (Race)
Winner: Richard Sachs Cycles

Cross Racing: Big Confirm.
Ability to Mud: Of Course.
Heritage of Sport: Very, Very High.
Funtimes Factor: Good, very good.

Do not even really know what to say about this one. I will start with "I'm not surprised." And "Fuck yeah!" You put it to the people and they vote and this is what they say and I raise my fist at you in a sort of rock and roll way.

Really though I don't know what to say so I will relate a conversation. Tonight, Steven Hunter and I were talking about Cyclocross and the upcoming season. A little early? Maybe, but it is still applicable here so I am going to just plow on, get it all out. We were talking about this little cross bike that popped up at the show... Rapha Speedvagen Speedvagen Rapha, did you see it? I'm certain you did. It was also in the running for best Cross bike. Had a lot of votes. Not enough, but still a lot.

Well, Steven and I were chatting about the... how should I say this... pleasures of riding on Carbon race bikes and debating going back to something like a steel cross bike (he had a Gunnar and me an Igleheart). My point was Dan Timmerman. Just that, that ended the conversation pretty much, because we both went, yeah - DT - that guy rules and he does it with a big fucking beard and a steel bike. See below.

Well, which ever way you roll there is no denying the heritage of sport that goes along with this one. Clear cut winner for me in that department. I do not know anyone who has more of a passion for this sport. And I will fight anyone with my bare hands that says otherwise. But be warned I will be holding a roll of quarters and shouting the whole time.

I guess it should also come as no surprise that Richard is also a big supporter of what we do over here in EMBRO land. I do indeed have one of his road bikes that much is true. Which, was also at the show. Also true is the fact that if he tried to steel me (yeah, I wrote 'steel' what you gonna do?) from my own team, he could probably do it. He would probably just stand one of his bikes on top of a hill somewhere (or get bearded Timmerman to do it, more biblical) and I would just wander around until I saw his bike shining from a mountain top and that would be it. It could happen you never know?

Ok, now I also have to say that there were some pretty cool cross bikes at the show this time around. When I first went to San Jose there was not a lot of Cross action going around. Seriously, I'll try to dig up some photos, but I remember (evertime that Igleheart would actually come back to the booth and stop chatting with K. Anderson) that I would cruise the isles like some horny teenager on the prowl. And what was a looking for? The sweet scent of, well, mud I guess, cross bikes definitely...

Nope, I just checked, my photo archives don't go back that far. Or at least not on this harddrive. But there are some pretty funny ones from Indy and Portland the year before. Ah how people liked me so much more when I just paid the bill and kept my mouth shut...

Runner Up #1: Igleheart Custom Frames and Forks

I really liked the Cross Bike in Chris Igleheart's booth. Why? Well, for one because I chose the paint scheme and that goes a long way for making me like something. Sorry, I do not mean for that to sound so...self promoting...but I have a couple bikes with the same paint scheme and I really like it. I also like Chris because he is one of the hardest working nice guys I know. And his heritage for the sport goes back as far into the New England scene as anyone else.

In fact I would like to make it official here. I do not know how this Framebuilders Collective happens to choose its members, but I would like to humbly submit Christopher for some of this action. And while I am asking for things that I will never get, I would like to be on the judging board of the NAHBS next year. What do you think? Vote for me. I'll spice things up a bit. Just sayin. Stranger things have happened.

I also appreciate the fact that Chris (and JimW) are going out of their way to use some alternate components on the bicycles that they bring to the show. SunRace? Honestly, I do not think that I even knew that they had a group available out there. So, it is a refreshing change to the usual Three (yes, there are three now - pay attention). So great f-ing job Jim and Chris for being there time and again and loving the Cross and helping to instill the cross love in me. Readers may remember that Jim is the one who first got me on a Raleigh Cross bike (who cares that it has 135mm rear spacing it was awesome).

Cross bikes cross bikes. We have two winners today people. Both that win just based on the simple fact that they both pour their hearts into each and every bike that they make. I can get behind that action. And I just knew that chasing those dudes around at Nationals was going to come in handy.

200: NAHBS - EMBRO Awards - Part One.

2010-03-07T16:30:00.000-08:00

EMBRO Award: Best Road Bicycle (Race)
Winner: Zanconato "Max" Road

above photos by Whit Yost

Road Racing: CONFIRM
Belgie Rating: HIGH
Edge Carbon Clincher Rating: OFF THE CHART

The results are in and now you shall have them (yes I am aware that I skipped Cross -for now). There was a little bit of question (from the higher ups) as to why I was doing this at the show. Why should I put together my own awards show when The Don already has one? Why Not? That is the simplest answer, but the real reason is two-fold.

A: Content - Things to talk about in Embrocation Cycling Journal
B: The People - They want to take your money? Well, then you should have a say with the judging at NAHBS. Hell, I want to take your money, so you should have something to say in ECJ.

I do not know if you know this, but I am always trying to find ways to gather up a little content. No offense to anyone in charge over there, I could rely on what comes out of it, or I could chase it down myself. Chances are that if you hold up these bikes with a different set of lenses that maybe you might see something that you missed otherwise. (Which I would guess is what they are doing with their panel of judges) Also, I have no idea who does their judging but apparently they did not realize that they already had a tandem category when they gave BEST ROAD BIKE to Bilenky Cycles for a Tandem. And it should go without saying that I am a huge fan of the Bilenky family. But really my friends? A tandem? "Pffff" that is what I say to that.

So, that is just one example of — A: Road Bike to talk about (it wasn't a tandem) in the publication. And B: You (the people who voted at the show) chose it, so you had a say in it.

We also did our own awards so that we could talk about the racier end of the family. And I do not just mean that weird uncle who kept trying to play grabass with your cousin Suzy, that was just weird. I mean race bikes.

I thought a lot about just this subject as I threw my leg over the ol trusty steed not once, but twice this past weekend. The weather in this fair state of Oregon was nothing short of magnificent. And when the weather turns in this direction it is without hesitation that I will reach for the "race bike." If I were a professional judger of "race bikes," which I am not I would look at them with a few different things in mind. Categories, if you will. Now, these would not be the most technical ways to look at bicycles, just my own approach so bare with me.

1) Awesomeness - this is mostly the aesthetics department. How does the bicycle look and how would I (being the judge) look astride a machine of this caliber? (obviously we are only judging the highest of caliber here.) Is the paint something that looks like it was gleaned from a mid 90's Alien Drag Race movie? Or does it have the subtle tones and unweilding power of...well, I do not know what... The thing about "awesomeness" is that it also goes miles in the ability to catch ones eye while at a tradeshow, and this, my friends is a not an easy thing to do. With bicycles all but piled from aisle to aisle you need something that is going to jump out and grab your attention.

Example: One company that does this day in and day out is Independent Fabrication. Every time they go to a show they find another way to keep things fresh. Could have something to do with my man Clint putting the finishing touches on them? Could also have to do with the fact that they care about what they're doing over there and that is kind of a big deal.

2) Weightness- We are talking race bicycles here right? Well, then guess what...weight is going to be a factor. And just as it might be tough to drag your own 150 lb frame (and I am using frame here in place of "body") up a mountain...it would most definitely be tougher to push your 150 lb frame and a 25 lb frame (bicycle in this case) up that same mountain. So, I am going to say the lighter, the better. I am also aware of this strange ability for bicycles to "ride light" which I would have to say that my Richard Sachs bicycle does.

Standout in this area would have to be Crumpton Cycles. With again, the IF wrecking ball close behind, but maybe I am a little biased?

3) Lateral Stiffness - Not really, just trying to throw you off with that one.

4) "Work Hard and Be Nice to People." This is actually kind of a big one for me. Because I am thinking about things in the terms of being a customer and the customer experience. For example I like dealing with Richard Sachs because he is a really nice guy - if you have ever stepped up to talk to him you would know this. Chris Igleheart gives me the biggest hug every time I see him - this is an action that makes me want to give him my money. Tyler from IF has slapped me on the ass more than once (I'm not sure exactly what this means). And Dave Kirk and his wife were excited to show me their new logo and paint jobs, this bodes well because I instantly made a connection with them (being a fan of graphics) and I remembered them when I went on to something else.

5) Historical Relavence — What do you know about these builders and where do they come from? And how does this sort of thing relate to you? I like the stories that go behind these builders. How many frames do they build in a given year? How long have they been doing this craft? What sort of riding do they personally do?(Sachs still races cross and Igleheart rides more than anyone I know). And all of these things become a factor in owning what you as a customer would consider the best bicycle EVER...

This is just my way of looking at a show like the NAHBS. Blink judgments and quick assesments are the way to go namely because as a buyer you do not have time at the show to look through everything. I definitely did not get to see everything that I was hoping to see. This might also be because I was trying to work in two booths and take a few photos along the way as well. Whew.

But as this week progresses I will tell you who won each category and then take a little more of an in depth look at who each of these people are. And of course how it all relates back to riding bicycles, embrocating your leggies, and well, I can't think of a third one at the moment.

Does any of that make sense?

199: SNAHBS Friday Awards. Not the Real Awards.

2010-03-05T00:05:00.000-08:00

I was actually really surprised at the outcome of the Actual Awards (this isn't it, they will come later.) But that is pretty much how my life goes. I think it will go one way and it ends up working itself out in an entirely different direction. I would think that Liz Hatch (from watching her Twitter - total follower) would have a whitty and insightful quote to insert right here. But I am not her, no matter how much I may try.

So, Awards aside, I saw a lot of funny and interesting things at the show, some related to bikes, some not so much. Wait, so I take that back, not Awards aside. I will get to the bikes later.

The SNAHBS HUMOR AWARDS

#1: The Not A Stoner But Has A Hard Time Convincing People Otherwise Award

This one is going to have to go to Rich Bravo. I mean, take a look at the photo above. I tried to take the photo twice and let me tell you this is the better of the two. Of course the huge doobie in the foreground (of the other one) did not help much. Kidding, I'm kidding. But Rich was pretty stoked out to get ahold of one of these Columbus stickers from Lodovico.

#2: Hairstyle Matches Own Logo Award.

I think that Erik was the first official friend that I made at the San Jose NAHBS a few years ago. We became friends at the bar (surprise.) And god damn if this is not one open and honest man. I love you for that Erik, I love you like one man loves another in a non homosexual way. By hugging openly in public a lot, and hi-fiving even more. In fact if you are not at every SNAHBS Show that happens from here on out I will cry one tear and then party the place to the ground in your honor. Erik also painted a disk wheel with a rape scene on it one year. And caught a lot of flack for it. Well fuuuuck that I say paint whatever the hell you want on it, its your disc wheel after all. I heard that there was some talk of banning him because of this. Anyway, I am not trying to bring up some old dirt, just pointing out that I like the fact that Erik is just going to do exactly what he wants.

#3. I Found Little Bobby's Backpack Award.

Yes, yes you did. And thanks for standing there while I took 40 photos of the damn thing. How amazing is this? I want one. And there could not, hands down, be a nerdier cyclist to properly convey the backpack theme. Myerson could give it a go, but it would have to be a Boston Redsox themed one, and Molly would kill it with a Hello Kitty Custom one, but I think that simplicity wins out with this one.

#4. I Will Not Talk To Anyone Till KBK is Over Award.

I witnessed Slate tell more than a few people that he would not talk to them about anything until the final 5k of Kuurne -Bruxelle -Kuurne was completed. In this case Steven Bilenky was the target of his wrath. It was short lived however, because Slate then rallied the troops and everyone within earshot found themselves cheering for someone they knew nothing about - Bobbie Traksel. Well, they do now. Hopefully.

#5. Best Use Of The iPhone Award

This is Slate's iPhone. As we were walking in to the hotel on Sunday night he said, "Whoa, Darrio just confirmed me as his friend on Facebook." And there he was. So, we promptly went over and told him about it, hoping for a great laugh together as newfound friends. He did not know what we were talking about, so we had a good laugh about it and became better friends. In other news I was very glad to see that "Slate Olson" was not one of his Google Alerts.

#6. Brand Most Likely From Portland Based on their Products.

It is cool. Now Molly can eat their cutting oil. Which is vegan by the way. Their hubs and headsets are too. Annodizing is what you do to those big ear pluggy things and we all know that they are safe for vegans, so, gobble gobble. I heard that there are less pawls (get it Les Pauls - nevermind) in some of their hubs this year as well. Something about not angering bees as much. (just roll with it, its funny for me.) Look for my returning series of Tweets called "That's SOOOO Portland" it may include things along this hippy related topic.

#7. Best Shark Related Cycling Cap Award

No idea who this guy is or who he works for (total lie) but I really liked his hat. Jay Sycip somehow managed to stay out of this photo, but for quite some time they were wrestling for possession of this hat. Its wearer is granted special hub polishing properties and I think that Jay was trying to win them over for CK. No big deal, he lost.

#8. Best Bellhop that Posed as a Framebuilder Award

Speaking of Jay Sycip here is his brother Jeremy pretending to be a bellhop. Who knows what is going on here, but damn if he does not look official. I like this guy. Know why? Because he (and his father) have prototype Nike's. I guess I am not "Prototype Size" which I am sure is something small, petite and not very manly, but I am still jealous.

#9. Best Shave Job Award and Most Handsome Man (tie)

This is Lex from Villin Cycles. He got best psyche out for shaving his beard. I have a video that I shot of his beard from last year. Just his beard. I will have to dig that one up for you because it is pretty awesome and has not seen the light of day yet. Lex would also go on my list of people that are awesome (with Erik and Jeremy) so there is a sub list for you. Plus, someone actually voted Lex's shaven chin "Best Promotional Materials" on the Embro Awards. Not sure how many votes that got, but it definitely made me laugh. If you are wondering what I am talking about, check out Dan Action's photos of Lex HERE.

I think that this s all that I have for you. There are much more that would and will be good to get up here, but they are all stuck in the purgatory between phone and computer. Some day we will get to see what Kyle from Trackosaurus looks like, but not today friends, not today.

198: NAHBS Richmond — Signal Cycles

2010-03-03T00:36:00.000-08:00

Here is a little video for you. This is Matt Cardinal of Signal Cycles showing me the Chris King headset on one of their most recent creations to feature at the NAHBS. The first moment that I was taking a look at their booth Matt called this to my attention. Pretty great way to go about things for a few reasons. One of those is because I like interesting things and a great way for me to hang around your booth is for you to point them out to me. (Dave Kirk's wife did the same thing by telling me that the new font they are using is something called Crime Scene -so maybe that says I am easy to please?)

Pretty cool concept for a greasing a headset. Especially when Matt said that Chris King himself stopped by the booth and gave him the full lowdown on the headset. This bike was a creation for Nate Woodman (above to the left of his bicycle) the proprietor of Monkeywrench Cycles in Lincoln, Nebraska - where Nate Meshke - the second half of Signal used to live. I have officially made Monkeywrench go straight to the top of my list of bike shops that I need to see (others include Above Category and Crono Metro). If only for the fact that Nate claims to have not one, but...er...more than one of these amazing headsets. Apparently there was also a pedal and hubset that went with it. The Hubs are actually on the bike.

Both Matt claimed that this was a pretty ideal build for them as Nate (W) basically gave them the headset and asked them to build a bike around it. Silly? Maybe, but you might also be surprised at just how often this sort of thing happens. Stop by at Harris Cyclery and I am quite sure that they could give you more than a few stories along these lines (think Sturmey Archer.) The ease also has something to do with the customer putting trust into what these guys are bringing to the table in terms of their taste. And with a glance around their booth it is easy to see why customers would leave the whole taste debate up to them.

The second bike that I was excited to see in their booth was one that they built for my favorite local bookstore/awesomeshop Ampersand Vintage. The blue bike bares the signature ampersand on the downtube and more than a few shiny bits to spice up the frame. I do not know if this would technically be called a rain bike, light touring, or maybe even the West Hills name that has been kicking around recently, but whatever you choose to call this style also add "Sick" to the front, effectively making it the Sick Light Touring, or the Sick Rain Bike, or even the SICK West Hills Bike...

Days before the show Matt and Nate went in to Ampersand to pick out a few extra little pieces for the bike and came away with this antiquated map of Portland to give it that extra touch. And when it is nestled all nice and snug under the viewing port of the leather accented bag it makes me want to do some light touring. Some leisurely parading, or even, if you must a romp through the forrested hills of Southern Oregon. I am not joking.

Myles has mentioned a few times the trip that he took a few years ago out of Portland and down through California on his previous touring bike. Nothing like a new bike to get you motivated to do some riding. I kept thinking about just this thought as I madly roamed the isles of the NAHBS "What is going to be my new bike? I want a new bike." Careful or I will get all Veruca Salt on your ass. Not the band.

The thing that I came back to while I was looking through the photos from the Signal booth, and it did not really hit me until I looked at them for the third time today was Signal's use of Portland throughout their booth. Take a look back through the photos and see what I mean. The Handlebar on the Orange one? Vertigo Cycles. The Hubs and Headsets on all of them except the orange one? Chris King. The Ampersand bicycle being a representation of the store and even the red 29er had "Portland, OR" emblazoned on the top tube. Hell even the handmade Carbon Wheels on Carey's Team Cross bike had one of the new incarnations to the club — Corsa Concepts.

So, I will leave you with that, and that is a good one, especially because it is well known that I am just a little bit obsessed with Carbon Clinchers these days, so I will look forward to hearing how these fare...

We are still waiting to hear a couple things about the Embro Awards. I will let you know the winners just as soon as I got the total tally and we check with the Supreme Court to see if that pesky First Amendment thing went through. Could be quite a bother if it does not because then all my reportage will be for naught. The people need answers.

Full-ish Set on Flickr.

197: NAHBS 2010 — Day1, Spoiler Alert

2010-02-25T21:40:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow the door will open and hundreds of thousands of people will quite literally pour through the doors to see what is new in the handmade bicycle world. Richmond is a pretty strange place. Very run down at the moment, and when we asked Chris Distefano, who is originally from Richmond, what happened to here the only thing he could say is "America happened to Richmond." So, take that for what you will.

The day started out as any day at a convention might. With loads to be unpacked and a few large crates placed throughout the hall. I would say that it is a real challenge to stand out in way of display. The real reason, because it takes a lot of effort to put together a booth, to make it something different than just another booth with a few bikes in it. Which is why I added "overall booth design" to the Embro Awards. Oh, wait did I forget to tell you about this?

Hopefully no one takes this as an attack (because I know that things can get sensitive around here) because it is really just my attempt to get some content for the next issue. There are awards that are given out at the show, but after I had so much fun at the end of the year with the Embro Awards I thought that it might be a good idea to carry it over this way.

So, there are two way to participate with this.

1) Show up at the show and fill out on of these cards. Do a little voting and then hand it back in to see who gets the award.

2) If you cannot be at the show. Take a look at the card above. I would send you one, but that might take a little too long. Then, as you are perusing the interwebs and all the photos that will be coming out in the next couple days, send me an email with your choices (jeremyddunn@gmail.com). That way your vote will still be counted. Fair enough?

I am going to do some little photos and profiles of the winners and I am also going to photograph some of the cards, so hopefully we get something interesting back from this. Or we might get kicked out of the show forever and ever again. But, I really hope not.

Also, if you are going to stop by the booth you can also pick up one of these little beauties. Put this guy together to highlight the racing team. On the front is a photo by Chris Milliman that is the inside front cover of Volume5. The back has a great Museeuw quote that Molly and I uncovered at the Flanders museum last year.

Alright, enough about that, actually I think we might be coming back to that a little more throughout the weekend. But I actually got a few sneak peeks for you from the show. I do not really know where to start, so I will just kind of go for it here.

There are some pretty cool things that I am psyched about. And maybe even a few things that I am confused about as well. Things like, where did those shifters come from (they are in the Igleheart Booth) and why do I not do more things with a cordless drill? But the thing that confused me the most this evening was when Nate from Signal Cycles put a spoon in his nose. That was weird.

196: PBS - Lazer Helmets - JC

2010-02-24T11:42:00.000-08:00

Just because everyone is out in Richmond, does not mean that things are not happening on the homefront. Ever wondered what Portland Bicycle Studio was all about? How about wanting to have Molly Cameron autograph the latest copy of CX Magazine? All of this can be yours and more next Monday night. And I am really hoping to get a one on one demo of the new winter helmet cover by Lazer. That thing looks sah-weet. I think.

There will also be some Ridley bikes on hand. Including, I'm told my Embrocation Racing Ridley X-Fire (however you want to say that is fine.) Take a look here if you are wondering what I am talking about.

Went riding with Molly last weekend and captured a few photos of this wild beast out of her normal PBS kit, but rest assured, it is still her. Josh Creem is responsible for the CycloSportif kit, but unfortunately the Waffle Coming out of the pocket (my favorite) is no longer available. Only the classy Belgian inspired one. If you have not seen Josh before, or smelled his delicious waffles wafting over the cross courses around the NW keep an eye out for him this summer. He is also a pretty damn good spinter and what one might call a "crit monster." And then, as soon as the weather starts to bite again he will be back behind the waffle maker.

Now, I know that what you were expecting today was the start of some NAHBS coverage and that is all well and good. But you will have to wait until tomorrow when I go under cover to get some of the set up of all the glorious booths. Now sleep.

195: Hashtag NAHBS

2010-02-23T08:35:00.001-08:00

Mary Arida took these Polaroids of Perri Mertens at Gloucester a couple years ago. It features in the new issue that, allegedly, if all goes according to planned, will be done in the next couple of days for the NAHBS. Mary also works at NYC Velo, which, if you have not been there, is pretty much the coolest shop in NYC. And while you are there, you should say hi to Mary because she is pretty much the coolest mechanic in the coolest shop in NYC. Just sayin.

Perri and I have/had (till I moved out here) been racing together for a while now. She was part of the original crew with Harris Cyclery and as well, my ride to almost every race that I did in my first few years of racing cyclocross. She has also been the design behind a lot of what shaped Embrocation, not only the Harris kits but also the jumping off of what was the Embrocation site. So, I have Perri to thank for a lot of things.

But, that is not why I was thinking about Perri this past weekend. I was thinking about Perri this past weekend because my feet felt like they were melting off.

I do not know how it happened. Maybe when I was in the shower some of the Mad Alchemy washed down and over my feet? (I was trying out the Cinnamon one - HOT) The potent embrolient (as Ben Lieberson calls it) could have stuck to my sensitive average sized clod hoppers possibly? It is definitely possible because later in the day, while I was lounging around under the sheets thinking about how amazing it would be if I could actually drift off into a nap instead of thinking about the #NAHBS— I started to feel my feet burning....

Backup a Few Years.

Perri and I are sitting in her vehicle. There have been a couple of them but they were always sporty, and to my knowledge always VW's. Could be wrong about that. In any case, we had just done a few practice laps on the Sterling Cyclocross Course. It was freezing, let me tell you. Fresh snow had neatly blanketed the entirety of the course overnight.

As Perri and I contemplated our race clothing choices in the car she turned over a brand new Speedstick shaped aplicator of Greyhound Juice. "You ever used this stuff?" My response I am sure was muffled, as any cyclist knows, you never want to be in a situation where a new subject is broached and you are not an expert on it. "No, I have used the Sixtufit stuff, but not that."

"Do you think it would work on our feet. Mine are freezing." And then we proceeded to smear the stuff all over our feet. Well, she smeared it on hers and I on mine, but you probably figured that much. The funny thing is that nothing happened. Nothing happened so much that as we returned to the car much later, after her Elite Women's Race we both commented on the fact that nothing had happened. Or maybe, and the details are a little foggy at this point, nothing happened so much that we forgot about it entirely.

Until we were about fifty miles down the road.

"I think we need to stop, my legs and feet are on fire. We need to figure a way to get this stuff off." We could not, needless to say, figure a way to get the greasy stuff off.

I guess, without getting too deep, that is kind how all of this has been. Just kind of rub it on and go. Hope for the best and maybe not burn your face off. Either way, I am excited for the new issue and to see some bikes this week. More previews to follow as I take off for the NAHBS tomorrow morning.

194: Rad Dad.

2010-02-16T01:21:00.000-08:00

It is 1:21 am. And I just had to tell you something. I am thinking that NAHBS is going to be awesome this year. I know, I know, I say this every year. But I have to say that I was not as psyched about it until right now. At 1:22 I got psyched about it.

Head down, focus on forward. Yeah, that is all well and good up until a certain point. Then, you just have to sit back and roll with it. Or something to that effect. I think my dad said that once. Its better to be lucky than to be good. But go ahead and make your own luck. That's fair right?

Happy Birthday Day Dad and Grandpa (same day, weird?)

I know it is a day early (it's the 18th), but I just wanted to get it out there.

While I was home (where is home anyway these days?) I shot some photos of my dad's workshop. This is applicable for a couple reasons. One of them is because it is about to be my dads birthday. And another is because he has always had a rad workshop. Rad Dad. Rad Workshop.

Sometimes it was robots, sometimes it was just computers with no robots, sometimes it was photo emulsifiers, woodshop was always there as well. Small engines was another class that he taught. Lots of books, lots of manuals, lots of knowledge. How does one person keep all that knowledge straight in their brain? I'll never know.

Maybe it is by keeping such a tight Workshop?

One thing is certain that you will gleam from these photos. My father is a sporting man. And I like that. (and the fly swatter does say Join our "Swat" team.)

193: More Riding and Rouleur #16.

2010-02-15T00:44:00.000-08:00

Did some more riding on Sunday which was fun. Just so that you know, when Joe says "easy" what that translates to is "probably not as easy as you might think." The light was crazy as well, maybe something to do with the moisture? Although, I profess, I am not much of a meteorologist. Or maybe, and this is probably closer to the truth. Maybe Saint Valentine was watching over us. Yeah, probably not that one either, since they are not even sure he is a Saint.

Big ups to Adrian and Steven who were 2nd and 3rd respectively this weekend. Oh and KV who was something like 12th in the Men's Pro field at the Cherry Pie Classic. Amazing. AO pulled off the second even though there were, and I quote him here: "A lot of antsy dudes trying to get away early." Way to hold on and then stick em at the end.

Also did some important reading this weekend that I really thought you should know about.

Rouleur #16

I think that the newest issue of Rouleur might be my favorite so far. Sure, I might be biased because I wrote a piece for the issue on last years Tour of California (which started on Valentines day none the less.) But that aside, everything about the issue is amazing. And I have not even finished reading the issue. Which means I will try not to gush, but if you get a chance to pick this one up do so (if for no other reason than they have been selling out - and one on ebay for $122.00).

In all seriousness. The Lichtenstein tribute that Richard Mitchelson does to the cover is the best break from the ordinary that R could have done. They handed it over to an artist. Rouleur has never done wrong by us with their wraparound covers and as soon as I saw this one I knew that Zed would be featured and my bossom grew with excitement. Can they do that?

The article that I read the other night was about the Shimano corporation. Part One anyway. Photos by Taz Darling are amazing to say the least. Which they normally are when you are dealing with Taz... Now, where normally we would see the broad expanse of what might be Flanders or a Queen Stage of the Tour de France is now replaced with the electric wires and steel girders. A golden mystical Tarrentino box opening to highlight their Shimano signage.

And the (almost) about face that Guy Andrews does in his introduction to Shimano is worth it alone. To think that someone could go from dyed in the wool Campag fan to — not only considering, but visiting and paying hommage to the legandary parts manufacturer is great. And at the same time instills a great confidence in me that at some point we really are all going to get along.

From there we move into Team Z (Zed) and I have yet to read this piece but it looks amazing especially the small touch of the "Z" everywhere. I have one of the Team Z bikes, was the first bike I really did a few races on. Stored away, ready for me to fall into that old school Dura Ace group. Also, it has an Italian BB which is odd.

The aforementioned Mitchelson illustrations. He does a great job with details. Notice the Sunglasses and the pony. And I'm not talking about a regular Pony here, I'm talking a Millar pony. Something that, as well with his Oakley choices has unfortunately gone the way of the Buffalo. Sorry guys.

Also, in one of the largest photo segments I have ever seen in Rouleur — Dan Sharp pays tribute to the Tour of California. I wrote the piece associated with it, but I do not know that anyone could pay tribute to a race as well as his photographs do. I was just a fly on the wall and Dan's photos represent much more than that perspective. Plus he got a cool shot of Tim Johnson climbing and Mancebo's winning day in the rain. The whole section looks good and is also sepperated from the other articles by its paper stock, which, I'm not going to lie gives me a 'paper stock boner' in the sense that I would just love to have these options. Just the option to use different paper stocks would be AMAZING....

(ps, I'm thinking that it might be Guy's secret little jab at American Cyclists that he always puts that ad - below - with the guy having plastic bags over his feet - next to us Americans. But we don't all wear plastic bags on our feet Guy. FYI.)

And the final installment is about another topic that I have no shame in loving - food. Pretty much one of the reasons that I like to ride my bike. Because I really, really like to eat. Willy Balmat is a Chef to the stars you might say. He is currently the Team Chef for Cervelo Test Team (hi guys) but has also done a stint with Mr. Armstrong and maybe a few other teams as well.

I am ashamed to say that I did not finish the article entirely before falling asleep with the book on my chest (how cute is that) but I will peruse and report back. And speaking of sleep.